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JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC, Counselor (LPC)
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 413
Experience:  25+ years helping people find solutions...
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WHAT DO YOU SAY TO A PARENT THAT BE NICE TO HER ADULT CHILDREN

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WHAT DO YOU SAY TO A PARENT THAT BE NICE TO HER ADULT CHILDREN WHENEVER SHE WANTS SOMETHING AND WHEN THE TASKS ARE COMPLETED SHE NEITHER CALL THE POLICE OR SHE CURSE AND YELL AT THEM FOR NO REASON? EXAMPLE: MY BROTHER COMES OVER TO PAINT AND DO THE YARD WORK AFTER HE COMPLETES THE WORK SHE TELLS HE TO GET OUT OR CALL THE POLICE IF HE IS DONE. MY BROTHER LOOKS OVER IT EVERYTIME AND I TOLD HIM THAT HE PUT HISSELF THROUGH THAT HEADACHE.
Welcome to JustAnswer! I am a Licensed Professional Counselor. Please note, this is not therapy, but information. I do hope I can help you though.

I am sure that is tough to deal with. Could you please answer a couple questions to help me help you? How long has you mother been this way? What was it like growing up? Did something specific trigger this behavior? You mention calling the police. Can you explain that better? The answer s to these questions and any other details will be helpful. Thank you!
Customer: replied 4 years ago.


My Mother has always been like this , but no one outside the home knew what she was doing only us. She really just want to scare us to do things her way being loud, cursing, belittling us as kids, pending us until this day against each other. She know if she calls the police she will have the upper hand we love her but she is running us away from her. Everyone that lives their always trying to help her in anyway possible, but I really feel bad for my siblings that cries and be upset with the on going put downs. What can we do to bring this family back together and to let her know that we love her?

I do not meant to belabor this, but what is she threatening to call the police for? The police do not usually get involved in domestic disputes unless someone is being violent or such.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

No that is just for control no one is being harmed. I am positive about that....we love her and she has a host of grandkids (approx. 30 total) and they love her too. When a person get older do they become meaner or hurtful or want the ones that love her the most to see her in that way to push them away. At this age of her life love is important.

Did I understand you to say she is 53 or was that your age?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.


My age.

That does shed some light on it. Yes, age does cause some people to became more easily agitated. In your Mother's case it seems she was already difficult to be around. It has simply gotten worse. My thoughts are you have managed to deal with her antics for these many years. You probably don't want rock the boat too much. I am not sure what is Going on in her life, but people her age often face depression. If you can do it, you might encourage her to talk to her doctor about medication for possible mood issues. I am perceiving you have a better relationship with her than maybe the others. Maybe you can talk to her and explain to her what she is doing to the family. I do suggest you maybe encourage her to talk to her doctor though. There may be medical reasons for her mood issues. I hope that was helpful that can be resolved withe treatment. Let me know if you have questions. I will do whatever I can to help you.
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Yvonne,

Hi! I appreciate you allowing me to help you maybe arrive at a solution the other day. I hope I was helpful. Let me know if I can help you in any other way.

John Michaels, MS, LPC

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