She may have to work on her own issues at the same time because there may be something at work here such as a mood disorder. The symptoms you describe are consistent with an emotional distancing or possibly depression. This can cause irritability as well. Then the behaviors trickle down to effect issues such as employment, relationship or family type problems. You can help her in working on relationship issues but she needs to see what is wrong with her individually. You can contact therapists who work on a pro bono basis or you can even encourage her to try some of the online therapy sites which are very affordable. You can Google online therapy for this
Try to help her sort out what is an issue with herself and how that influences the problems in the relationship. You may want to try self help first since money is tight. My favorite guides for communication which is where you start is the Mars and Venus series. Learn to have excellent communication and you can solve almost anything. This maybe is what has been a problem in the past. When she can't resolve issues she runs. You may be the partner that helps her develop necessary skills.
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