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Norman M.
Norman M., Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2568
Experience:  ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.
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job worries

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Hi, I am a 28 year old married woman- I've been struggling on and off w/depression for several years- not currently doing any treatment for it. I recently started a new job a month ago that is extremely stressful, now I learned the coworker that was training me is leaving. I will be left on my own with a new girl to work with, and I can't begin to think of how I'll manage this. I have a 2 year old and would love to stay home with her, but am afraid she won't get the social interaction she needs without going to daycare. I have social anxiety, and it's hard for me to get out around people. The job I have is a very busy medical receptionist. I could talk to my boss about not being able to handle it, but I feel terrible because we are so short staffed the way it is, and I don't think they can do much about it at this point. I wouldn't mind a part time job, but I feel so burned out from working in the medical field the last 8 years. Also, I live in a very rural area-my husband farms- so there's not many jobs around here at all to choose from. I have no idea what to do. My marraige is strained and my daughter's been having trouble w/biting at her daycare. I also lost an uncle and my grandfather both in the last month. My husband has been so busy that I hardly see him. I feel like the stress is getting to be way too much for me to handle. Please don't tell anyone this, I just don't know who to turn to. What should I do about my job

NormanM :

Hello, I'm Norman. Are you ready to chat?

NormanM :

I see that you are still offline so I'm going to switch this to Quetion and Answer mode and leave a reply for you there.

I think that first of all, you need to get an evaluation from your Doc to see if you are depressrd, and if necessary get some help.


I’m going to suggest that too you would benefit from some Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.


CBT is based on the fact that what we think in any given situation generates beliefs about, and reactions to that situation, and also causes the behaviour and feelings which flow from those beliefs and reactions.

These ‘automatic thoughts’ are so fast that generally, we are unaware that we have even had them. We call them ANTS (automatic negative thoughts) for short.

If the pattern of thinking we use, or our beliefs about our situation are even slightly distorted, the resulting emotions and actions that flow from them can be extremely negative and unhelpful. The object of CBT is to identify these ‘automatic thoughts’ then to re-adjust our thoughts and beliefs so that they are entirely realistic and correspond to the realities of our lives, and that therefore, the resulting emotions, feelings and actions we have will be more useful and helpful.

Some CBT would help you identify and deal with your stressors, and indeed help you see the wood from the trees.

Cognitive therapists do not usually interpret or seek for unconscious motivations but bring cognitions and beliefs into the current focus of attention and through guided discovery encourage clients to gently re-evaluate their thinking.

Therapy is not seen as something “done to” the client. CBT is not about trying to prove a client wrong and the therapist right, or getting into unhelpful debates. Through collaboration, questioning and re-evaluating their views, clients come to see for themselves that there are alternatives and that they can change.

Clients try things out in between therapy sessions, putting what has been learned into practice, learning how therapy translates into real life improvement.

Please visit this website for much more detailed information on CBT:

http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinfoforall/treatments/cbt.aspx

If you cannot afford to see a therapist, there are good free CBT based self-help resources here:

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/cbtstep1.htm

Also, there is a book called ”Feeling good - the new mood therapy” by Dr. David Burns. It has a hand book which gives you practical exercises to work through and further instructions on how to better use CBT. I really do recommend it.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Workbook for Dummies By Rhena Branch, Rob Willson is also pretty good.


As far as your job is concerned, it is ESSENTIAL that you talk to your Super visor about the position you find yourself in. They need to know, so that you don't get blamed if things start to get out of control.


If the practice is short staffed, then it is due to poor management – in no way is it your responsibility, and you should not be to sorry for them. You have YOUR life to consider, and management has to solve its own problems.

Norman M. and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Katie - is there any other information you require?

If not, would you be so kind as to rate my answer?

Thanks, Norman.

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