Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.
Tell me about the fear.
I'm a molestation survivor
that was going to be my next question. Are you in therapy now?
I'm afraid of being touched
yes, I am
I understand. Ok great and do you work on any grounding techniques?
I know about grounding techniques but don't know how it applies to this...........
I think they can be used to calm your fears so that when you are feeling worried about being examined by the doctor that you remain present in the now and not go back to an earlier time of abuse.
oh, btw, I also have DID...........so my dr only has met my alters, not me
so if you ground yourself and focus on your breathing during the examination then you can feel safe enough to let the doctor do what is needed without it feeling like a replication of the abuse.
Even more reason to work the techiniques
do you do any relaxation techniques to help with your fear and anxiety?
would you be open to listening to some?
I usually just shut down and have an alter take over
and that has been extremely self protective.
that is a relaxation CD
yes, but I don't want to be so scared......
I know you dont and that is why it is important to do the relaxation every day before the appointment so you can go to that place of comfort and relaxation and also ground yourself.
the crazy thing is, I'm not so scared about the touch as my reaction to the touch.............
remember it is not a touch but an exam by a doctor who will touch you and not in a way that is molesting.
I will try and remember that..............
but I know that is how it feels for you so a lot of self talk reminding yourself what it is and what it isn't may help a bit.
problem is..........it was a dr who molested me
do you have a safe person who can accompany you to the appointment?
does this doctor who you are going to know of this history?
yeah, I have a friend who's going with me. yes, he knows my history
excellent on both fronts and then you can share with the doctor just how nervous you are so all things can be lined up to help you through it.
what if.........................what if I kinda like the touch???????? is that ok? is that bad? I'm scared of my reaction to the touch
Those issues i believe should be looked at with your therapist.
I'll take a look at the website you gave me
excellent. I wish you the best with it. Keep working hard in your therapy and all will be well at your appointment.
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have a safe and restful night.