How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask KansasTherapist Your Own Question

KansasTherapist
KansasTherapist, LSCSW
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 565
Experience:  17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
KansasTherapist is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I have mild hypospadias that prevents me from enjoying a sexual

Resolved Question:

I have mild hypospadias that prevents me from enjoying a sexual relationship. Currently, there is a girl that is flirting with me. I can't enjoy sex with my condition. I understand that sex isn't everything, but even if I started dating her, eventually sex would be a topic. I don't want to give her false hopes and then tell her 6 months into dating. Currently, I don't even know if I should date her in the first place. I just don't know how I should let her know about my condition. Then there is the other problem that I just feel that I can't relate to other guys because while all the other guys are dating, I feel like Im treated like the guy in the outfield because I am scared of dating with my condition. I know that if I get the surgery to fix to the mild hypospadias, I would feel better, but until then, I feel extremely lost and alone.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  KansasTherapist replied 1 year ago.
I can see why you would feel isolated from both women and other men. Have you been evaluated for the surgery?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
not yet... I just discovered what my condition was a couple months ago. I tried to ignore it for the longest time and pretend that I was normal, but I finally decided to look for information on the internet about it. I realized this was a $4000 dollar procedure and Ive been raising the money for it, but in the meantime, I just feel like I can't pretend Im normal anymore, but I feel to ashamed to let other people know exactly what this condition is. Ive tried to tell other guys that I have personal issues that prevent me from dating but that answer only has pushed them to treat me even worse. Then there is this girl I like and she is flirting with me also, but I don't know what to tell her. Before I would just ignore the condition but eventually relationships would lead to sex and when I had sex, I wouldn't feel any sensations because extra skin and chordee from the hypospadias isn't allowing me to have normal sex. Like I said before, I don't want to sound like sex is everything, I just don't want to give someone false hopes into believing in me only to disappoint them later.
Expert:  KansasTherapist replied 1 year ago.
Sex is important in relationships, so I can understand why it's difficult to date. You would need to be with someone who could be patient and willing to do other sexual things besides intercourse, at least until you can save money to have the problem corrected. I suggest you try dating this girl until you get to know her better. You can decide then, whether she is someone you could talk with her about this.
KansasTherapist, LSCSW
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 565
Experience: 17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
KansasTherapist and 2 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
< Last | Next >
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
  • I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well! Claudia Albuquerque, NM
  • Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion. Kevin Beaverton, OR
  • Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
    I feel better already! Thank you.
    Elanor Tracy, CA
  • Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem. Julie Lockesburg, AR
  • You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions. John and Stefanie Tucson, AZ
  • I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!! Janet V Phoenix, AZ
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dr. Keane's Avatar

    Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/Dr.Keane/2013-8-20_204325_drkeane.64x64.jpg Dr. Keane's Avatar

    Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    5024
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC's Avatar

    Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    3733
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/DrAkiraOlsen/2012-2-20_746_AkiraADpicmain.64x64.jpg Dr. Olsen's Avatar

    Dr. Olsen

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2336
    PsyD Psychologist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/norriem/2009-5-27_134249_nm.jpg Norman M.'s Avatar

    Norman M.

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2193
    UK trained in hypnotherapy, counselling and psychotherapy and have been in private practice. ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), UKCP Registered and ECP.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/PsychologyProf/2010-07-15_171248_logos060400409.jpg Dr. Michael's Avatar

    Dr. Michael

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2177
    Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KURTEMMERLING/2010-07-23_215531_just_ask_picture1.jpg Steven Olsen's Avatar

    Steven Olsen

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1727
    More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education