i have a drink problem and don´t know when to stop or when i´ve had enough. this has now lead my boyfriend of 10 years to leave me, as it always ends up in an argument and then the next day i don´t remember anything. i need to know how to control drinking and when enoughs enough.
Person's Gender: Female
Person's Age: 27
just trying to stop when i feel tipsy but i always want more
Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.Dear friend,I am so sorry that you are experiencing this difficult problem in your life, and that it is now affecting you in such a negative way.From your symptoms, it seems that you could be on the verge of becoming an alcoholic. You want to drink and you don't know when to stop. You apparently cannot stop until you have had too much. This is a serious problem for it has now destroyed a long-standing relationship, and could interfere with many aspects of your life, including your career.I know of when excellent resource for you, that could reverse this downhill slide and turn your life around. There are English speaking Alocoholic Anonymous organizations that meet regularly throughout Spain, including the islands. This would be your best bet to get free, effective help immediately.You can get all of the contract information and meeting times at this website:http://aaspain.org/I wish you great success in turning this around as soon as possible, and uge you to contact them immediately to begin the process.Warm regards,Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
Thanks for your response. I have looked at their website and contacted a woman who hopefully will give me some advice. I don´t class myself as an alcoholic as I don´t drink daily. I need to train my body/mind to know whens enough, maybe its a confidence issue as I am shy and not a good talker until i´ve had a drink. Do you think I should quit altogether?
Dear Suzanne,AA does not give a definition to alcoholism. Perhaps you are just suffering from social anxiety and you need a few drinks to "loosen" you up, and just don't know when to stop.Unfortunately your longstanding boyfriend lost faith in your ability to control your drinking, and left you. If you do have social anxiety or Social Phobia, then you can be treated with Cognitive Behaviour Therapy which can train you to interpret things in a more positive manner and thence control your behaviour because you have truly seen your situation from a slightly different angle.AA has two interesting websites, one defining alcoholism medically:http://www.step12.com/alcoholics-definition.htmland the other providing a self-test as a prelude to further treatment.http://www.step12.com/alcoholic-definition-and-self-test.htmlThere are other approaches such as Stages of Change therapy, but that may not be available in Spain.Finally, there are medications that can be used for social anxiety, as well as counseling. The safest is a beta blocker blood pressure medicine often given for "performance" situations such as acting, musical performance, sports performance (banned), or general public gatherings. It is called propanolol (the universal generic name).I don't recommend substituting one drug for another, but he propanolol is safer and with much less side effects than alcohol.If you can quit altogether, and stick to it, then this would by far be the best solution. I have conducted many drug cessation programs at the local county jail, on a voluntary basis, and have seen great results, including people who vowed not to drink again once they were released, and have stuck to their self-promise.I wish you the courage and strength to stop as of now. I still recommend that you attend some meetings and learn and be inspired. However, it is in your hands, and it seems that in your case, they are apt and able hands.Warm regards,Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
Licensed, National Certified; college prof;35 yr experience
Sorry for the delayed reply. I´ve had my parents visiting and they have also had some helpful pointers and made me feel positive, so thanks for your help and advice much appreciated.
Dear Suzanne,Thank you for the positive affirmation and for accepting my answer. I am sure, with your level of maturity and wisdom, and the backing of good parents, you will achieve your goals.Warm regards,Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC