Hello Dr. Sewell:
Sorry I'm late getting back to you but I wanted to bring you up to date. Thank you for your comments and your preliminary diagnosis. I was mistaken about mygrandson's age. He is 20, won't be 21 until next April. Johnny is an Eagle Scout (still active as a scout leader), accomplished musician (plays first violin in the local symphony orchestra) and is active in his church. He was treated for Attention Deficit Disorder as a child. Over the years he has demonstrated disregard for the consequences of his actions- failed to turn in homework assignments, made up excuses, rationalized, began stealing and lying about it.He barely made it through High School. I would say he has become untrustworthy, unreliable and unrealistic. He wanted to go to college but did not begin to have the qualifications. He has no friends. His younger brother is just the opposite - top high school grades, full scholarship to college. Johnny has had some unfortunate experiences during the past year or so that may have served as a wake up call. He stole a neighbor's diamond ring and credit card (and used it), used his mothers's credit card, stole cash from me and his grandmother. For the ring and credit card incident he was arrested and went to court where he was let off easy as a first offender (two years probation). Later he was caught stealing a $25. item from Costco and was arrested and ordered to appear in court, which he failed to do. A warrant was issued, and he went to jail for four days. At a court hearing he was fined $200. and put on five years probation. I met with Johnny. He admitted he has problems, wants to solve them and is willing to accept help. It is very difficult for him to find a job because of his arrest record. But he has able to find odd jobs. I met with Johnny and his Mom and we reached an agreement that Johnny would pay back the money he stole from us. He wants to pay the court as soon as possible. Yesterday he came over and paid us what he owes. I told him if he's short on funds to pay the court I'd load him the difference. He wants to go on a mission for the LDS church. He's the first to admit he needs a structured program.The church and the court would have to agree on this. We're working on that. It fits with your recommendation for a change in environment. Also I have arranged for Johnny to see a local therapist, which I have agreed to pay for. I think we are making progress.