I have read both of those books, the After Silence one I think just last Fall. Maybe I need to read them again. But honestly, "reclaiming my body" or anything having to do with my body is really the last thing I want to deal with right now.
I do think it was a productive session, and I am glad I was able to tell Linda to just stop talking. Because I really couldn't take hearing another thing about any of this right at that moment. I have another appointment tomorrow evening, so we'll see how it goes. I am having to control my tears right now, of course, as I am at work. But I will try otherwise just to let things happen, emotion-wise and try not to overthink it or question whether it is appropriate or overdramatic or if something is wrong with me for crying and feeling the way I do. I really will try. When I go home from work, I will take a long hot bath (which I find is a private and good place to cry) and I need to go to bed early anyway, because I am exhausetd from the emotion, the anxiety over A's situation and how I handled it, staying out late last night because of the concert, and the migraine and meds .... so, if I go to bed at 8 or 9, it would be perfectly understandable, I'm sure. And I will not fight it then., either. It's just that I need to fight it when I am around others. Except Linda, apparently. Then I can also let it go tomorrow during my appointment with Linda. So I am going to try my best to follow your and Linda;s advice. I'll let you know how it goes.
Also, I got an email from CPS this morning, saying they got my information, and it was "written up" at 9:46 this morning and referred to the assigned case worker, and she gave me the caseworker's name and contact info. She didn't say anything about ti being opened already by FAP, but it had the same CPS reference number the FAP person gave to me as the CPS referral number, so ?? Oh well. I'll keep you updated.
Sorry about that, Shay. I didn't know you had read both of those books. As you said, maybe looking at them again might help now that you are in a different place since you started.
I think you have a good plan for tonight. A bath and some sleep can put a new perspective on what you are dealing with. It may take some time to practice letting go of over thinking and judging your emotions. Don't be too hard on yourself about it.
Thanks for the update on A. I appreciate you letting me know how it's going.
You're welcome :) I wanted something that could help you with all that you are going through and Matt Atkinson is known for his books about trauma. I didn't want to overwhelm you with too many books and this one seemed to fit with how you are feeling now.
I am going to be off line more than on today due to obligations so if you post, I will try to get back to you as soon as I can. Hope your day goes well!