KansasTherapist : I will be on line for an hour or so if you want to chat.
I am not sure if this is working?
KansasTherapist : Hello
sorry I was confused about how this works
KansasTherapist : It's okay. You can just type now and we can chat.
KansasTherapist : You're having a hard time with anxiety?
I am in constant fear of dying
like now, my doctor told me yesterday I have broncitis and I am freaking out
KansasTherapist : Do you know someone who speaks English and German you might have go with you to an appointment?
yes I do but they have zero time
when they do have time there isnt a theripist open
KansasTherapist : Would you consider medication for anxiety?
I would like to explore other options first
KansasTherapist : Okay.
KansasTherapist : Some times thought stopping helps with anxiety.
I really feel like I just need to address with someone why I am having these feelings
KansasTherapist : Anxiety is both a mental and physical illness.
KansasTherapist : Once your mind starts thinking about the anxiety provoking issue, your body gets triggered.
KansasTherapist : The reaction of your body then reinforces the anxiety. It becomes a bad cycle.
KansasTherapist : How did you first start thinking about dying?
im not sure really.
KansasTherapist : Was it when you first got to Germany?
no I think it started before then but It has been all consuming since
KansasTherapist : Do you want to try thought stopping?
KansasTherapist : First you think of things that help you feel calm. What relaxes you?
honestly, I cant tell you what does anymore.
KansasTherapist : What about things like the ocean, rain, the wind in the trees?
thinking of those thing isnt calming to me anymore. that is way I am here. I cant stop this overwhelmed feeling
KansasTherapist : It sounds like you might need some meds for a little while in order to be able to calm down enough to use other techniques.
that isnt the answer i was hoping for right now...
KansasTherapist : I understand, but you seem to overwhelmed to manage your anxiety right now.
I just reallly want to talk to someone right now. I am terrified of taking medication.
KansasTherapist : Okay
I dont know where to start. I am feeling very affraid and lost.
KansasTherapist : Is there anything in your life that is going right?
yes. everything is great. My marraige is strong. I am happy where I am. But its is the constant fear of keeling over one day that is the bad part
KansasTherapist : Does your husband know what's going on?
It makes me feel ou of Control. I had a very very bad childhood where me being in control of my self kept me alive.
yes he does. and he trys to help. But if he cant understand how can he help?
KansasTherapist : So being out of control is the worst part?
its not the being dead part. Its the dying part that terrifes me
ultimate lose of control
KansasTherapist : Sometimes wrapping in a blanket and rocking helps.
i am calmer now. i guess I just what to know if there is anyway I can find a counselor online via skype or whatever to talk to. I have dealt with this enough. I am tired and it is going to ruin my life if I cant change it
KansasTherapist : Hang on, let me check.
KansasTherapist : http://www.talktherapynow.com/TherapybySkype.en.html
KansasTherapist : This is the address of a therapist who does therapy by Skype.
KansasTherapist : I hope they can help you.
KansasTherapist : Is there anything else I can do?
nope thats it. Thanks for your time
KansasTherapist : You're welcome.