I am very sorry to hear of the situation. Can you tell me if he has had the same Psychiatrist the whole time? Does the Psychiatrist work in public or private health? How did your husband choose this particular Psychiatrist?
This really does sound like a difficult situation you find yourself in. My first reaction is that his case needs to be reviewed by a second Psychiatrist (preferably senior to his current doctor) as his treatment is clearly not working. The episodes should absolutely not be increasing in frequency and in fact this is usually an indicator of deteriorating mental health. Most antidepressants require a slow tapering off period as sudden cessation can cause significant complications - it sounds like this is exactly what happened!
It is absolutely ethical for you to approach his Psychiatrist as it appears that his treatment is failing and also that he is disengaging from treatment services. I appreciate that Cliff may not like you doing this but the botXXXXX XXXXXne is that his health is deteriorating and something needs to be done about it ASAP. If Cliff is unable or unwilling to recognise that a second opinion is required then it's going to have to be up to you to make it happen. It is standard practice to seek a second opinion and quite frankly after 12 + months of unsuccessful treatment his Psychiatrist should be doing this anyway.
This is a seriously clinical situation and far more than you can reasonably be expected to take care of on your own. Priority number 1 is to get him reviewed and if you can help to make that happen sooner than later then you are doing your part. Do you have easy access to his Psychiatrist?
Ok, good. Unfortunately it's not uncommon for people to able to hide their more challenging behaviors outside the family.
I hope this been of some help. If you have further questions or would like to clarify/elaborate on any part of my answer please let me know. If not....I wish you the best of luck!