I'm sorry to hear of the situation, it sounds as though you have been really let down by the person you consulted with. You usually can lodge complaints regarding poor treatment, what kind of professional made the diagnosis? GP, Psychiatrist, Clinical Psychologist?
I'll wait for your response and then we begin to discuss the diagnosis and appropriate treatment.
My aplogies for the slow reply, I had t leave my computer for a while.
If you wish to make a complaint then firstly you can complain to their employer, clinic or hospital. If the complaint is to report serious misconduct, you can complain to the General Medical Council (0845(NNN) NNN-NNNN. The last step for dealing with unresolved complaints is to contact the Health Service Ombudsman who acts as a final arbitrator.
It's unfortunate that nobody has taken the time to explain the diagnosis. Let me start of by making it clear that many, many people experience BPD type difficulties and many, many people have great success in using the right treatment approach. Before I launch into a long description of the diagnosis it might be best if you tell me what you know at this point about BPD so that I don't tell you things you already know.
What can you tell me about BPD?
Thanks for the extra information. Have you done any reading on Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)? DBT is the recommended treatment for BPD and doesn't typically delve into past events in great detail (if at all). DBT is very much present focused and concentrates on developing skills in distress tolerance, emotional regulation and interpersonal communication. Overall DBT aims to help people gain better control over the emotional experiences and expression.
You are right ti noting that there are people in prison with BPD but there is a far greater number with BPD who never go to prison or get in trouble with the law at all. Nearly every Psychiatric diagnostic category is over-represented in the prison population and this is because offenders tend to have very high rates of mental health problems. There is a correlation between mental health difficulty and offending but it is small (meaning that people with mental health problems in general have a slightly higher rate of offending). If you've managed to stay out of trouble for 35 years receiving a diagnosis doesn't now put you at a greater risk of landing in jail.
Yes there is.
Start by taking a look at this excellent self-program for improving emotion regulation here http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfm/infopax.cfm?Info_ID=51. It's the workbook titled 'Facing Your Feelings'. It's completely free and offers very practical guidance on how to begin to manage intense emotion in a more effective way. I notice that the link appears not to be working at the moment but I expect it will be fixed shortly.
There are also a number of books that could assist you to learn Dialectical skills at home and to generally manage typical BPD problem areas. If you are interested in doing some further reading I can recommend both this book here and this book here .
If you do decide at some point to get some profesisonal help then you can contact The British Psychological Society here for assistance with finding a DBT trained Psychologist in your local area. The NHS covers sessions with a Psychologist in many circumstances and you can begin to check this option here. Also, take a look at an article published by the American Psychology Association here. It's an interview with a senior Psychologist and covers some of the things you should consider when you looking for a Psychologist.
I hope this has been of some help. If you have further questios or would like me to clarify or elaborate on any part of my answer please let me know. If not......I wish you the best of luck!