Thanks for your reply.
I don't think he feels more than as a friend because after the first time I left him I got a bf, and when he contacted me a month later I told him that,and although he didn't ask me much detail he was just glad about it.
While we were communicating via email, he has dated with a few women(not at the same time) but he always told me that he didn't love them. he often told me he doesn't feel anything, probably due to the injury he has. So he broke up with all of them. Now he doesn't seem to be interested in dating anyone. He often told me that he was scared of commitment.
He often told me recently how much he enjoys writing me and how much it refreshes him. Once he called it "an infatuation." I don't know how to interprete it.
When I told him how much I love him 6 days ago, he was kind of surprised. He said he didn't notice I had such strong feelings for him. I think I've told him how I feel many times so far but he didn't react. He always seemed to be too preoccupied with his own thoughts to pay attention to how I feel about him. But this time he was more sympathetic than ever before, and asked me if email communication was somewhat frustrating for me. I was glad he finally noticed how i truely felt about our relationship. But then I acted impulsively and told him I want to leave him for good. But this is when he told me he felt a bond to me too which doesn't make him want to leave but rather continue communicating.
I know it would be very painful if he started dating with someone else again but I still want to be friends with him.
So my question is how long should I wait before I contact him again? It's been almost a week since I stopped talking to him but if I emailed him right now I think he'd get angry?
I'm sorry if this email is a bit confusing.
It sounds like his brain injury or his emotional issues are interfering with his ability to be with anyone, including you. In that case, it may be hard to get him to be in any relationship but if there is a chance for him, it is probably with you.
I would contact him within the next few days. Let him know that you were hurt and didn't know what else to do but break it off. Keep it short and simple and say you were sorry. That way, he doesn't have too much to deal with. He may need some time to deal with how he feels, but that can be his decision. He will know that you are there when he is ready.
Ok, but I don't have any ways to deal with my feelings for him at the moment. If I contact him again he might ask what I would do if communicating with him become painful for me again. What should i say to make him feel safe?
Let him know that you are working on this issue. Tell him that you see that you have an issue with this situation and you are trying to find the best option for the two of you so you can remain friends. And let him have control over whether or not he is ok with that. Tell him that it is up to him after you make contact, but that you are trying and you do care.