Hi! I believe I can be of help with this issue.
First, let me say I can imagine how frustrating this situation must be for you. I can sense your deep frustration at your husband's lack of personal motivation and momentum and lack of consideration and showing of love and caring. You are clearly an intelligent and competent woman and feel demoralized and at a dead end from this. And you have now begun to consider leaving, which is an important sign that the problems are growing and need fixing urgently.
The fact that he is willing to go to couples therapy only now that you have threatened to leave is, of course, not an encouraging sign. I work with couples here in the US and I can tell you that the number one problem in why couples therapy doesn't work is because one spouse is not really interested in making any changes. They are in therapy only because the other spouse is highly motivated. But the spouse who only agreed to go as a desperate way to not have you leave is usually not seeking to make changes but to just keep you from leaving. He'd like things to stay pretty much as they are without you giving him a hard time.
And this is the much more of a factor in the success or failure of couples therapy than the particular style of the therapist. Most people get to couples therapy too late: one spouse, you in this situation, is about to give up, and the other spouse is not interested in changing anything about himself.
Okay, I wish you the very best in this and in the future!
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