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Hello! Please remember that my response is for information only, we are not establishing a therapeutic relationship.
This was a traumatic event, I can't imagine how scard you and your wife must have been.
Since there is nothing wrong physically, I would say you are suffering from the effects of trauma.
My recomendation would be that you look into Eye Movement Desensititization and Reprocessing (EMDR) which is a therapy that helps people process through traumatic events. www.emdr.com
When something traumatic happens to us, the memory gets stored with all of the thoughts, feelings, images, and body sensations that occured at the time of the trauma.
Upsetting events get "processed" through so that they are no longer upsetting (like many arguments, getting cut off while driving, other conflicts), but traumatic events doen't get processed properly, so they stay with us. A common saying is that "past is present."
The EMDR therapy targets the traumatic event and through the eye movements (which mimic REM sleep --REM sleep allows us to process events from our day via dreams) helps you work through the event so that it no longer affects you in the same way.
If you have no history of prior trauma (meaning this is the only one), it is possible that this problem could be worked through in the matter of 1-3 sessions (although that's not a guarantee, just an average for singe incident traumas).
Looks like you are not available --please feel free to respond with follow up questions.
since this happened i have not been the same, sexwise.
before this happened sex was great
i never feel bad and always enjoy sex
but not as much as before and it is not
as good for my wife, of couse.
i have never heard of the thing you recommend, but i will check on it.
hard to rate you as you made a recommendation but i have not had a chance to see if it works or not. i do appreciate your time. maybe i can get back with you at a later time and give you
any results. i am going to lunch, but will ck back.
Hello --the fact that you had a satisfactory sex life prior to the incident is a positive indicator that you can return to that level of functioning post treatment.
Yes, the recommendation is my opinion based on the information that I have on you --however what you would do is consult with an EMDR therapist to determine whether or not it is in appropriate treatment for you.
EMDR tends to get to the "heart of the matter" very quickly, whereas other forms of therapy would probably focus on relaxation, your thought process, etc.
Those are good things too, and are actually a part of EMDR as well.
You are welcome to continue the conversation with me after you check out the recommendation, that would be fine with me.
Have a good lunch!
I WENT TO THE WEBSITE YOU TOLD ME ABOUT AND FOUND 2 PEOPLE
I CALLED BOTH, BUT CANNOT GET IN CONTACT WITH EITHER
ONE HAD HER PHONE DISCONNECTED AND THE OTHER LINE
IS ALWAYS A BUSY SIGNAL AND I HAVE TRIED COUNTLESS
TIMES AND AT VARIOUS TIMES OF THE DAY.
SO, I HAVE HAD NO RESULTS TO REPORT FROM
THIS VENUE. I DO NOT WANT YOU TO NOT GET PAID SO I AM GOING TO GIVE YOU A RATING EVEN THOUGH I FEEL I WASTED MY TIME AND MONEY. NOT YOUR FAULT ANYWAY.