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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5762
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Kate, I see my therapist tomorrrow and I am still quite

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I see my therapist tomorrrow and I am still quite angry and hurt on how she treated me. She knew I didn't want to leave upset for the weekend which was why we agreed not to talk about the assault. I would love to show up at 1:10 tomorrow but you said that everyone feels the need to get some revenge for being hurt in or out of therapy. In situations like therapy, people are especially vulnerable. But you also said that this really hurts me in the long run because then I lose valuable time from this "game". But I do need to get it off my chest somewhat or it will stall me in therapy.

She said I wanted to shock her about the not eating issue. She wasn't shocked and then asked me why I wanted her to be. I wanted some understanding. It isn't easy to go so long without food. It's been 10 days now that I have not eaten anything. She simply said she couldn't make me eat, the end. I wanted to look into why I wasn't, etc. I am afraid to bring this up again tomorrow. She was so flippant about it.

Help! I think I am in a sinking ship. Do you have a life preserver?


It sounds like your feelings were very hurt by what your therapist did, and understandably so. But it can help to think of it this way- if you did show up late to tomorrow's session, what do you gain? What if your therapist doesn't say anything? How would you feel? And if she did say something such as "why are you late?" you could say because you are always late. Then you express your feelings anyway. A more direct route of telling her saves you from looking like you are just interested in revenge. The main feeling here is that the therapist did something that hurt you and getting that across directly is the best way to get it resolved.

I'm not sure why your therapist did not react as you thought she might to your lack of appetite. But the important thing here is why you feel it is significant. Not eating is a symptom of your OCD, as you mentioned. But what else does it represent to you? If you want your therapist to be shocked, that might signal that you need something more out of what you are doing. Others reactions are important to you. So it could mean that you are looking for someone to care. That is somewhat different than just straight OCD. And that means you have an unfulfilled need.

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