Thank you for the additional information.It sounds like you were not able to get the attention you needed as a child to feel that you mattered. Although your parents may have not mean to, they did ignore you, which in some ways can be considered neglect, at least emotionally. And if you naturally had a quiet personality, then you would have had no reinforcement to draw you out or help you gain self esteem. While you have done some things that are very helpful, and smart, to address your issue, the basic problem needs addressed. Most men get their sense of self from their relationship with their fathers. Since you did not have the opportunity to do so with a father who was so busy, you never got the connection you needed. So you now have to fulfill that need on your own. When reading your posts, there were several comments you made about yourself that put you down or made you seem less than others. This is the type of thinking that will bring you down. You mentioned trying to change this, which is a good way to address it. But just changing your thinking is not going to make you feel better permanently. You have to follow it up with believing that you are a good person with many good traits. For example, begin your day with affirming that you are smart, capable, and a good person. Then take those thoughts and act them out. If you have to, pretend all day that you are this person. As you do this, over time you will see that you begin to believe it. And you will find that you are that person. It was just your beliefs that held you back from seeing it.Here are some links to help you:http://psychology.about.com/od/PositivePsychology/f/positive-thinking.htmhttp://psychcentral.com/lib/2011/self-esteem-struggles-and-strategies-that-can-help/I hope that helps you. Let me know if you have more questions.Kate
I would like to help you further with your questions but I do need reimbursed for my work. If you would like to work together, that is fine, I am more than happy to help. But you may need to contact the moderators so they can explain how to reimburse for answers.