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Ask Dr. Kaushik Your Own Question

Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik, Psychiatrist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3988
Experience:  MD Psychiatry
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my boyfriend of 4 years started taking adderall about 5 - 6

Customer Question

my boyfriend of 4 years started taking adderall about 5 - 6 months ago. He has been asking me to marry him for several years and I finally said yes about 2 months ago. He was so happy and told everyone he could find even to the point of embarrassment. He, 2 weeks ago, stood in the kitchen and said "thank you for making me the happiest man on this earth, I never thought I could ever be this happy".

We went to a party that weekend at his families house and everything was great, he was affectionate etc. etc.

3 days later he sent me a text telling me he was unhappy and was moving out.

Some additional facts:
1. he has continually increased his dosage of the adderall and is taking at least 60 mgs daily and sometimes more because he kept getting new higher dosage prescriptions and was hoarding the unused ones. He became very agitated as the hoarded ones started to run low and he was going to have to go back to the max the doc said which was 60 mgs.

2. We had been fighting more lately because money is tight, he had hurt his neck was was going to the doc (vicodin, soma, MRI, then cortizone shot), my dad has Alzheimer's, I am going through and IRS audit (a lot of work but no problems), yes we had been arguing more but then would pull together and talk about how great it was that we were pulling together rather than running away from each other.

3. in the last 3 weeks he had gone from arguing (normal) to rages, screaming in my face, screaming over the phone, the horrible looks on his face.... I didn't know who this person was.

I have 2 kids (12 and 16) and I told him he could not act so erratic around the kids or he would have to leave. I would not allow them to see that kind of behavior. He said no, no, I am just having a rough time so we would make up and be fine.

Then he was at his Mom's house because his Stepdad had become ill and he sent me a text telling me he was moving out. He came home for a couple of days and was cold as ice, fought alot, would not talk, all he said was "you wouldn't listen to me".

We have been together for 4 years and there have been ups and downs but this came completely out of the blue and I am wondering if all that mix of meds could cause it, is it just cold feet about getting married, did he just suddenly wake up and say I have been faking this all along and I don't love her....

Any input would be helpful.

Thanks

Beth
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 2 years ago.

Dr. Kaushik :

Hi there,

Dr. Kaushik :

Welcome to Just answer !

Dr. Kaushik :

Well, can you please tell me what all other drugs is he taking right now other than adderall ?

Dr. Kaushik :

i am waiting for your reply and will get back to you once you reply to my quer?

Dr. Kaushik :

Regards..

Customer:

He takes Prozac, vicodin, soma, something for his thyroid and something for colesterol.

Dr. Kaushik :

Thanks for the reply..

Dr. Kaushik :

Well, there are two plausible reasons for him to be behaviing like this which are --

Dr. Kaushik :

1) he is abusing adderall and taking it more than the recommended dose and as it is seen with adderal it has a tendency to cause mood fluctuations and even manic like behaviour , which can explain his abrupt mood swings and abrupt inexplicable poor decisions

Dr. Kaushik :

2) he is under lot of stress , may be due to financial constraints and family problems

Dr. Kaushik :

So, i would like you to do not jump to any hasty conclusions regarding him and your relationship , all you know he is doing all this due to stress or / and adderall abuse / overdose ..

Dr. Kaushik :

so you need to take some time off and calmly sit him down when he is in a better mood and ask him to open up about what is going on and also try to get hold of his adderall and try to regulate its use or talk to his prescribing doctor and ask the doctor to regulate his dosage

Dr. Kaushik :

Is this clear..

Dr. Kaushik :

i hope this helps..

Dr. Kaushik :

is there any other query..

Dr. Kaushik :

There is no need to panic here

Customer:

I can not sit down with him because he has moved out. I asked him if he thought it could be the combination of medications he is taking since it has all been so new - the prozac and adderall started 5-6 months ago and the vicodin has been going on for years and the other thyroid and colesterol are within the last 6 months.

Customer:

He flipped his lid when I asked him if that could be it and screamed at me to stay away from his medications.

Dr. Kaushik :

yes..

Dr. Kaushik :

this is exactly what i believe it

Dr. Kaushik :

is

Dr. Kaushik :

he is taking his drugs callously

Dr. Kaushik :

most probably self medicating

Dr. Kaushik :

overdosing with vicodin and adderall

Dr. Kaushik :

can very well lead to erratic behaviour , abrupt irritability and anger outbursts

Dr. Kaushik :

and mood swings

Dr. Kaushik :

i believe you should talk to his prescribing doctor

Dr. Kaushik :

and ask him / her to intervene

Customer:

I can't do anything about it now. He has ripped our family apart and broken my heart but should I/can I do anything to help him. Should I call his doctor or should I just walk away.

Dr. Kaushik :

call his doctor

Customer:

Oh.... I see you answered that question.

Dr. Kaushik :

i think there is still scope

Dr. Kaushik :

of resurrecting this relationship

Dr. Kaushik :

which is falling apart

Dr. Kaushik :

so for the sake of 4 yrs of relationship in which you shared some excellent intimate moments with each other and the life that you shared

Dr. Kaushik :

so for all of this , you should not let this slip away like this

Dr. Kaushik :

without a genuine try

Customer:

That is what I think but he won't talk to me AT ALL!

Dr. Kaushik :

so call or meet with his doctor and tell him about your concerns about his recent behaviour and possible drug abuse

Customer:

So it it OK to do that? Will they talk to me?

Dr. Kaushik :

and from my personal experience , i would also like to tell you that in a few days he is more likely to come back to you apologising and requestiing you to take him back..

Dr. Kaushik :

Well, a good and concerned doctor shall be receptive to your inputs , more so because you have been a partner for past 4 years..

Dr. Kaushik :

so give this a try

Dr. Kaushik :

as this is what you have under control

Dr. Kaushik :

his change of mind is not under control of yours, so kindkly do what is under control

Customer:

Thank you. You have been very helpful and very compassionate as well.

Dr. Kaushik :

and that is to let this come out in the open in front of his doctor..

Dr. Kaushik :

I hope this helps..

Dr. Kaushik :

Wish you all the best..

Dr. Kaushik :

And be strong , be proud of yourself ..

Dr. Kaushik :

you have been great mother and a role model to them

Dr. Kaushik :

and a genuine person like you need to give your relationship this try ..

Dr. Kaushik :

Hopefully things will work out for you ..

Dr. Kaushik :

Take care ..

Dr. Kaushik :

Please press the ACCEPT button if you are satisfied with answer as only then will i be credited for my service.

Dr. Kaushik :

Warm regards..

Dr. Kaushik, Psychiatrist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3988
Experience: MD Psychiatry
Dr. Kaushik and 3 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 2 years ago.
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.

I didn't get to read the last part. It timed out. I would like to read it and will then hit accept and make great comments. You have been wonderful to talk to .

 

Beth

Expert:  Dr. Kaushik replied 2 years ago.

This conversation is stored in your account , which you can gain access to anytime.

 

You may just do that by reading things i mentioned above.

 

Warm regards..

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