Thank you for the additional information. I can understand your predicament and the reasons you might not be so keen on attending AA (although if you are interested in pursuing treatment for the alcohol issue, I can certainly provide you with some referral information.) I can't say for sure what is going on with you without having an in-person evaluation, of course, it's not unusual that the anger/rage issue is exacerbated by alcohol (although I understand that this issue is also there when you're sober, alcohol acts as a facilitator and so you're more likely to have outbursts when you're drinking.)
I'd like to provide you with some more information so that you are informed and are better able to decide what you'd like to do in terms of treatment for the anger issue.
It sounds like your symptoms (combined with the alcohol use) are consistent with a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder
(although again, this is just for informational purposes and I cannot provide a diagnosis online.)
It's a disorder characterized by frequent anger outbursts, unstable personal relationships, feelings of irritability and other symptoms you can read about here:
If this is the case, a specific form of therapy known as dialectical behavioral therapy can help. You can read more about this here:
It's also possible that it's a disorder known as intermittent explosive disorder (a relatively common disorder in men). You can read more about that here:
Treatment for this disorder usually involves psychotherapy and/or medication.
You can find a therapist who can help you on this website:
I hope that helps. Please let me know if you need additional assistance or have any follow-up questions.