That makes me feel better about things with Jim. I have felt bad about not setting him straight in the car. But I could not have guessed how his behavior would progress in a few years. I will try to deal with him as you suggested. I do like his wife, but not enough to hang around with him. There have been a few times I have told him to shut up or he was being inappropriate or he was being negative or had a bad attitude, and it doesn’t help matters. Once during praise team practice before church one morning, when I was playing the drums, he came up and grabbed a microphone (I don’t think it was his Sunday) and said “I don’t care what C says - I’m singing this morning.” (Because he was upset that C asked his wife to sing on her off week [to cover for me since I was playing drums] but didn’t ask Jim - because he didn’t need him). I said “nice attitude, Jim” and he took off mad. He smoothed things over later, because there was no way I was going to apologize. I told him that he needs to remember that this stuff isn’t about him - it’s about praising God, and he needed to change his attitude about it and support whatever C is led to do. He actually accepted that, and was pretty good for a few weeks. But it didn’t last. But I think you are right - the best way to deal with him is with neutral responses and firm boundaries. C’s wife gets creeped out by Jim, too. But as I said, I’m not too upset about the whole thing this morning. Jamie is still mad as heck, but she should be. He was really mean to her.
Do you really think I could have died? And if so, is it because they talked about it and you think that the mean one might not have had reservations about doing it? Or do you think that because of the things they actually did
– that it could have had more serious medical consequences?
Court went well and I am making good progress on my work. :)
Jamie told Austin this morning about what I was dealing with. He came into Jamie’s office on Friday when we were talking about nightmares
, and said “you have nightmares all the time?” and I just said yes, and he said “is that why you wouldn’t let my mom share a room with you and P on the mission trip?” and I said yes. But then it got all weird and I was really uncomfortable. He had asked Jamie a number of times before he left for school if I was dying or something, because I used to never go to the doctor and then suddenly went all the time. That’s why I ended up telling Jamie, in general, because she thought I had some terrible disease or something. When Austin came back last week, he asked her if I was okay, and she said yes, and he said he didn’t believe her. She told me that she understands why I don’t want him to know anything, but he is really concerned and thinks something terrible is wrong. And we both know Austin would never tell anyone. So I told her if she felt he needed to know something, she could tell him, but not while I was around and I didn’t want to talk to him about it. I felt okay with that, and Austin is such a strong Christian. I could use his prayers. So I guess she told him something this morning - I don’t know what - but it cleared a lot up for him she said. I feel okay about it.
I don’t feel as angry today. I actually feel pretty good and peaceful. And I slept very well last night. :)