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Linda was probably talking about the same thing you and I talked about a few weeks back with the inner child work. What about doing that makes you feel unhappy?
It seems like the two of you touched on most of what you wanted to talk about so what about the session made you feel depressed? Was it an expectation you had of the session or were you looking for Linda to respond in a different way?
Do you feel there are some unresolved feelings about your conflict a few weeks ago that you need to talk about?
Happy (belated) birthday to your brother!
Are you doing alright? I didn't hear back from you and wanted to check in to see if you just didn't want to talk today or if something is wrong.
I'm fine. I had some back-to-back meetings this morning . And anyway, I didn't know what to say. Just in a funk since last evening.
I'm glad to hear that you are doing fine. If you want to talk about how you feel about last night, I'm here. Even if you feel you know what I will say, talking it out can help to lift your mood. But if you need a break, I understand.
What did she say that made you feel that way?
It's not what she said, exactly, it's just how I felt about the whole thing. She had me think back to when I was, like, 10, and come up with nurturing things I would have like to have heard back then. She told me to just sit and say these things over and over to myself each night. She said "these were things you needed to hear, but didn't, and still aren't going to hear." One of the things - which she came up with - was that I needed someone on my side. She told me I could probably get my parents to say that - just call them and say "I need you to tell me you're on my side" without explaining anything. What good would that do? Having my parents repeat a random sentence? That's all it would be. And who cares?
I know what she's doing - it's like what you and I discussed. But basically, the message I got was: nobody is going to love me or value me except myself, which makes me feel pathetic.
I see what she was doing. She is trying to get you to nurture yourself which is inner child work.
When she tells you to think of nurturing things that you should have heard as a child then say them to yourself, basically she is helping you see that you can approve of and love yourself without your parents doing so. Your parents stepped out on this part of your growing up, not giving you the attention and love you needed. You did end up getting it from others, like your aunts and grandmother, which is very resourceful on your part. But as great as that is, you still needed it from your parents because they were your primary caregivers. The bond between you should have been the strongest of all. Plus, their rejection of you would stay with you regardless unless you could overcome it yourself.
The question here is whether or not you feel this is something that you need. Either you feel you don't need it and you really don't, you feel you don't need it but you really do and can't acknowledge it or you do need and know it, but just don't want to feel the pain associated with it.
At this point, if you feel that calling your parents to say a meaningless phrase to you won't help, then don't do that. You can tell Linda that you do not feel there is any value to that idea and don't follow through. She'll understand.
If you want to clarify it, we can try again. I need to be off JA for a short while then I will be back to answer you.
Maybe if you take some time to think it through it may come to you.
I'm here if you want to talk.
That's ok Shay.
I'm glad to hear that C did not inquire any further about how you are doing. It must be a relief.
How are you feeling today?
That's to be expected with what you have been going through.
I'm here if you need to talk.
Okay. I guess I'll talk to you some other time, when perhaps I have more direction. Meanwhile, I hope you're having a good week.