How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Heidi LPC Your Own Question

Heidi LPC
Heidi LPC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 235
Experience:  Licensed Professional Counselor
65628425
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Heidi LPC is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

i already know there is no answer for this that i can deal

Customer Question

i already know there is no answer for this that i can deal with. but it has to come out. im a convicted sex offender. i could have fought it and got off. my word against thiers. but i did the right thing for the victums sake. and that brings me to now. when people find out i get alot of hate and anger.a few wanted to put an end to me but my daughter stopped them. told my last girlfriend about it the first day and she said she was ok with it.[ she was so beat down by her ex anything would have been ok] at least till some friends found out about it. she said nothing and was ashamed of me, it was my daughter who stood up to them, i was not there or my problem would have ended there. a couple months ago the girlfriends family which i was very close to and care about, found out and she was so asamed she never came back and took off with my new van, if i try to get it back then im the bad guy again. too ashamed of myself to push to get it back, so ill pay for it, i always pay for it and will pay till i die. no one wants to be with a sex offender. women or men.death is so inviting but i cant hurt my daughter like that, again it is her that saves me. so i sit alone in my depression waiting and wishing for the end of it all. alone, all alone.cant afford "help". no one to talk to. no i will not talk to my life saving daughter, you see, she is my victum, and she will put this on herself for reporting the abuse. so, what now, will never get away from it, cant confront it, did that 14 years ago, but it still comes after me, never ending, till I DIE
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 2 years ago.

CoachJenK :

Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.

CoachJenK :

I commend you for coming here and reaching out. It takes a lot of courage for you to do so. I hear your pain and hear the pain of your daughter. You do deserve to have a safe place to discuss all of your feelings and work through them. I know you said you cannot afford treatment, so I would like to suggest you contacting these people here http://saa-recovery.org/ as they are based on a 12 step model and you may find it beneficial to attend their meetings and get support. They may also be able to have some resources for you daughter to get the support she needs as well.

CoachJenK :

The website above has a lot of information on it and so please spend some time looking around and please find a meeting that you can attend.

CoachJenK :

I see that you are offline, but let me know your thoughts and again I commend you for reaching out and your desire to get support and help.

Customer:

already been to over five and half years of talking about it and help. talking about helps for only a moment in time. peoples attitude towards those like me only get worse over time. [i have seen in them, hear it on tv, and is shown in the law.] so that will never change for the better. the law that informs the public about me will not change, so that will always sending more new anger and hate to me, so that will never get better for me, my last relatonship helped relieve it enough to bear but she left in shame of me, i know you will say there will be another. i dont think so. i took ten years of suprised, disgusted, hateful looks and attitudes to find a beat down lady that would accept me. no one wants to be with an offender. if you think otherwise, just ask you daughter or sister or mother. you will get your answer. the ONLYway out of my pain is....death

Customer:

suicide is out of the question for my daughter sake but an auto accident or work related accident is worth consideration. just a thought.

Expert:  Heidi LPC replied 2 years ago.
Until Jen comes back, may I just add that I have worked with sex offenders individually and in group. I know and understand how right now you feel shunned and excluded socially in the world. You are internalizing the way the world is looking at your past, and you have the choice to continue to base your quality of life on other's views, or on what you have learned about yourself and others based on your past. If you had a crystal ball, you might be able to predict the future; but, you probably don't.. :-) so, I say stop looking behind you or too far ahead of you, and just be in the now. Focus on doing things now that are comforting, talking to those who do love you, and getting through just one day. Tomorrow may bring a new opportunity that you couldn't ever predict in your wildest dreams. I just want to say hang on, and know that there are those of us in the world who know that people deserve second chances and aren't scared away from this title you are defining yourself by. You are more than a sex offender; you are more than just your mistakes in life, provided you have learned from them and will never make those choices again. You can choose to share your lessons with others in a group, in writings, etc... and maybe help someone else because of your experiences. Jen should be checking back in soon... and until then, just hang in there!
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
been there done that and life goes on with the anger and hate. its always there, never ending. and only one solution
Expert:  Heidi LPC replied 2 years ago.
I hear you... keep reaching out for help and don't give up. Eventually, someone or something is bound to come along that will change your view... just get through today.
Expert:  Heidi LPC replied 2 years ago.
The fact that you wrote to this site tells me that you haven't given up completely, and that is a great step. I hope that you will consider our ideas and thoughts, and know that you truly are not alone. There are others in your exact shoes; your goal must be to figure out what keeps them going and living, maybe through searching online for their stories and use whatever advice you can get from them to get through this despair you are feeling. Your daughter needs to see you model being and acting as a survivor, and not a victim... she needs you to show her how to survive making a mistake and going forward in life. It will help her in her own life struggles to see that you don't have to give up when faced with adversity; that you can make something good come from something bad.
Heidi LPC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 235
Experience: Licensed Professional Counselor
Heidi LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
< Last | Next >
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
  • I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well! Claudia Albuquerque, NM
  • Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion. Kevin Beaverton, OR
  • Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
    I feel better already! Thank you.
    Elanor Tracy, CA
  • Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem. Julie Lockesburg, AR
  • You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions. John and Stefanie Tucson, AZ
  • I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!! Janet V Phoenix, AZ
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/Dr.Keane/2013-8-20_204325_drkeane.64x64.jpg Dr. Keane's Avatar

    Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    5024
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC's Avatar

    Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    3733
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/DrAkiraOlsen/2012-2-20_746_AkiraADpicmain.64x64.jpg Dr. Olsen's Avatar

    Dr. Olsen

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2336
    PsyD Psychologist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/norriem/2009-5-27_134249_nm.jpg Norman M.'s Avatar

    Norman M.

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2193
    UK trained in hypnotherapy, counselling and psychotherapy and have been in private practice. ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), UKCP Registered and ECP.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/PsychologyProf/2010-07-15_171248_logos060400409.jpg Dr. Michael's Avatar

    Dr. Michael

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2177
    Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KURTEMMERLING/2010-07-23_215531_just_ask_picture1.jpg Steven Olsen's Avatar

    Steven Olsen

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1727
    More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education