Thanks for letting me know. JA sometimes has issues like this. Most of the people I've talked to just change accounts, like you just did or they open a lot of new questions. Sorry you had to deal with this. It's frustrating.
I hope you are doing alright. If you want to talk, I'm here.
I will repost your question so I can respond better:
Kate:The only issues I can think of that I am worried about (in addition to those we all have been addressing a lot already) are: (1) the sexuality issue; (2) I don't know why I dream, and sometimes "see" in the daytime those few things that didn't happen. I don't know from where those came, and I worry that I am either still just making things up in my head, or they did happen (although I really don't see how), in which case, I did worse things than I thought and I would be disturbed if I didn't remember everything.Before when I tried therapy for short amounts of time, I never told them everything, and maybe would tell a few things, or maybe not any details at all. This time, I have told you and Linda everything that happened that night. And I think I've told Linda most everything else. There are a few things I haven't been able to tell you, but they are not directly related to that night. So from what you are saying, the chances of some other big issue "popping up" are minimal, right?
I think some of the things that you are seeing that were not part of the original attack may be there because of the strong feelings you have around the attack. You have talked about feeling you are at fault and that you feel ashamed which can trigger other "memories" that you have based on how you feel, changing what originally occurred and adding to what happened. Memory is a difficult thing to rely on because it can get marred with feelings and perception which change how you recall situations. You know from your work that you can have five witnesses to a situation and they will have different versions of what happened. That is because their feelings and perceptions interfere and change the facts.
If you have told Linda most everything and me most of it as well, then there is no reason to believe that there is more to it than that. The only thing that might surprise you is how you feel about something or a new insight into a situation. But that would just be reaction based, not new information.