Hi! I just asked some follow up questions in the other question thread you have open that was directed specifically to me. I'll paste in my follow up questions here as well:
You know, to give you the best answer, I think I should ask you a few questions first that will help define the problem and the situation.
Your question is very evocative that there is so much behind the simple few words you write. You've had depression for so long. Three possibilities: you have treatment resistant depression, you need to consider other treatments such as electroconvulsive therapy (ECT), or you may have an underlying disorder that hasn't been treatment and depression may be just part of that disorder.
Was there trauma or abuse in your childhood? What about alcohol or dysfunction in your family when you were growing up?
Are you interested in ECT?
Are you getting any psychotherapy treatment right now? If so, what type? How is it going?
If not, when was the last treatment? What type of treatment was it? Was it helpful?
Any extra information that will help, feel free to share.