Thanks Kate for being there for me as usual. I do feel better today. Just a tiny bit of inner anxiety
because I don't trust what's ahead yet, med wise but you know mornings are my worst time of day,
I didn't tell you but within the past week two of my friends had sudden heart attacks. One, 58 years old, died alone. The second, my daughter's ex brother-in-law had a massive one last Friday night. He's alive and well only by the grace of God after being without a pulse for well over a half-hour. He's only 45. The week before that another friend's brother slipped in the bathtup, fell, broke his neck and it killed him. I know you will think this is silly but yesterday morning our two cats who love each other suddenly began fighting and nothing we could do would stop them no matter what we did
. This lasted well over an hour. It turned out one cat was sick, which, according to the vet, caused her to fight the other.
Normally I'd be upset over all of this but none of it would have caused me to get anxious or feel out of control. But then again, Joe and I were sitting talking about how I was feeling and he said he felt the same way - unnerved and like waiting for the other shoe to fall and his personality is definitely the opposite of mine. Layed back and not much gets him upset. So maybe the way I felt was normal for me under the circumstances of where I was yesterday.
Today I accept that I have one med washing out my body and another med entering it and my brain chemicals need time to adjust. How long that will take I don't know but eventually it will all even out and I'll be feeling fine. Until then I have to accept what is and trust God, knowing He will get me through and it all will end up working out for my good. I accept that I can't make it happen any faster than it's going to take.
In the meantime, I will do my relaxation breathing and listen to some Christian relaxation tapes I sent away for.
BTW, do you have much knowledge about sleep apnea? I have some questions I'd like to have answered. I won't be seeing my sleep doctor for another two weeks.