Hello, I am a psychiatrist.
To answer your question, there ABSOLUTELY IS
hope for you.
At the same time, there are a number of complicated issues here that have to be identified specifically before they can be treated appropriately, including your mood issues, your need for stimulation, your drinking, and perhaps others. The purposes of a face-to-face psychiatric evaluation is to identify these problems, but sometimes it is confusing, for example, if someone has bipolar
disorder (or some variant of it, such as cyclothymia
) or ADHD (or both) or something else. As such, the best thing to do is to give the psychiatrist as much detail as you can (concisely) about these symptoms/behaviors. That way, he/she will have the best opportunity to start unraveling these problems and knowing how to best treat you. It might be very helpful for your wife/girlfriend to go with you to the psychiatry appointment; often spouses give a ton of really helpful information - but it isn't mandatory. It will also be helpful to jot down on a calendar just 3-4 words every day between now and your appointment that describe what your mood was like that day. Such a "mood diary" is very helpful to psychiatrists.
Bipolar disorder and attention problems are very treatable, and from what you've shared, I don't see why you couldn't be appropriately stabilized so that you can focus on living a life that is more fulfilling than it is now.
Does this make sense?