Ask a Psychiatrist and Get Answers to Mental Health Questions ASAP
I understand. What ever is going on, it is helpful to talk about how you feel. Even if you are not willing to share the actual event, talking can help you feel connected to others and take some of the burden off yourself.
Since you feel uncomfortable telling the people you know about what happened, how about sharing with a stranger? Not just anyone, but someone you can trust but whom you do not know personally. Someone like a crisis counselor at a hotline or someone at your local community mental health center. You can pick who you feel safe with and who you feel you may not see again. The idea is to be able to express what happened without feeling embarrassed or burdened about sharing. And you can get support and input at the same time. It may also give you practice for telling someone you do know when you feel ready to do that.
While you consider that option, keep trying to put your feelings down on paper and expressing them as much as you can with others. Make sure you are taking care of yourself by getting enough sleep, eating well, and doing stress relieving activities like exercise and having fun. It will help you counteract the stress of the situation.