Welcome, I'm a professional counselor and behavioral-consultant. I'd like to chat with you for a few moments to better understand your question.
I'm just going to take a moment to read over your question again...
Ok. I've re-read your question again. I'd like to chat with you still and perhaps answer your question with in the context of chatting with you.
to start off with, I am very sorry to hear that you are going through this right now. It must be incredibly difficult. In my experience as couple-counselor, I've learned that one of the keys to a healthy long term marriage (with all of it's incredible and protective benefits for the whole family) is that basic relationship needs are met reciprocally. And where they can't be met for reason's outside of the couple's control they are at least explored. What are top 2 most important things you need from your relationship right now?
What do you really need from your husband that you are not getting right now, the most?
respect/support and aknowledgment of all the things I do for him and the family. the kids are too young to say thank you and understand. He is the only person who is capable of appreciating what I do for them and make gestures to say thank you. This is both true for the relationship and being a parent.
Is it more the heart felt expressed acknowledgement or do you need actual support more in the form of shared work load?
..or both equally?
No, the work load I can handle. Despite, me doing everything (I was mowing teh lawn 8 months pregnant). But I'm fine with that. It is simple gesture such as him making sure we are taken care of before he leaves. Taking charge in more responsiblities, especially in our relationship.
Would you mind clarifying what you mean by "taken care of before he leaves." and, "Taking charge in more responsibilities"?
Would you mind giving a concrete, best example of both?
I can't . Now I have to go attend to the kids. This is what I get, 5 minutes to try to solve everything.