I'm glad to hear the crisis has passed.
It might be a good idea for him to try individual counseling first, to heal some of the wounds of the past. You can search for a therapist in your area with this directory:
Then, when he feels better about himself, it will be time to try couples counseling. I like the Imago method, as it teaches a lot about communication between the couple. They offer both weekend workshop intensives and also have private therapists trained in the technique. If you could afford a workshop first, it would be a great way to jump-start things again on the right path. Then, if there are issues between you that still seem to get you stuck, you could go to individual therapy with someone who uses the method.
About the cheerleading thing....read the first book I recommended. He doesn't have to fit some 'sport-guy' mold for it to work. The authors are psychologists, and their research has proven that men respond better to specific praise for something they have done than they do to vague praise or to criticism. This is fully explained in the book. Read it first, and you'll see why things have gone wrong in the past and how to fix them.
I'm glad this emailing is helpful to you. Just so you understand how this site works: we are all free-lancers, working from home, and the only way we get paid for our work is if the customer clicks on the Accept button. You forgot to do it last time, so I'd appreciate it if you would this time...thanks!
If you'd like to work together again, put "For Suzanne" as the first two words in your question, and they'll notify me to answer it.