Hi! You know, to give you the best answer, I think I should ask you a few questions first that will help define the problem and the situation.
I don't want to assume what your question is. Could you instead state it for me?
What happened do you think to you in this situation that you reacted this way?
What is the state of the relationship now?
Was there trauma or abuse in your childhood? What about alcohol or dysfunction in your family when you were growing up?
You've had lots of psychotherapy for a long time. For what problems?
Are you getting any treatment right now? If so, what type? How is it going?
If not, when was the last treatment? What type of treatment was it? Was it helpful?
Any extra information that will help, feel free to share.