How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Mark Manley Your Own Question
Mark Manley
Mark Manley, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 402
Experience:  Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Over 15 years exp. Married 30 years and happy.
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Mark Manley is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Can you ever overcome sexual abuse in your childhood on your

This answer was rated:

Can you ever overcome sexual abuse in your childhood on your own? How do you cope with broken relationships with the abusive father and oblivious mother?
Question #1 above:
No. You will need some assistance. When you are ready you will find out something wonderful. The wonderful thing you will find out is that just as you were wounded by people you will be healed by people or at least with their assistance. Trying to heal all by yourself is a burden, finding people who can and will help with the healing process is a great relief.

Question#2 above:
Usually there is a time of separation (no contact) which creates a time and space to do some of the healing that needs to be done inside you. This time of no contact can last for years. It is not a maneuver to punish the abuser or to wake up the oblivious mother, it is a time and space for your healing. The goal is to get healthy so you can take good care of your self when you interact with the sick ones. Re-establishing contact in a healthy way requires the assistance of an objective trained counselor/mentor/coach, to help you to have clarity and safety.

Regarding the recurring memories and feelings:
Now you are an adult and it's time to heal the wounded child inside you, thus the trauma is knocking on the door of your consciousness so you can do your healing work and become whole and well.

Naturally you feel ashamed, embarrassed and exposed, and naturally you don't want to have to talk with another person about what happened. It was not your fault. You are not bad. You are good. Reach out to a counselor who understands and feels comfortable working with these issues and start to heal and free your self from the prison you have been living in.

My heart goes out to you. I wish you great courage, and I know you will find peace if you will work through your healing process.

Let me know if there is anything I can do to help.

Mark Manley
Mark Manley and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

Related Mental Health Questions