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Mark Manley
Mark Manley, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 402
Experience:  Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Over 15 years exp. Married 30 years and happy.
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sister dating her possessive ex

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sister dating her possessive ex
I can see why you would be very concerned for your sister. This must be very difficult for you to watch. The core problem is your sister does not have sufficient self esteem. Every thing else is a symptom.

You can talk to her, warn her, etc. but you know that her need to be needed is greater than her need to avoid the pain she is heading for.

You need to let her live out her life, including her relationships.

The best you can do is to build her up as a person by expressing confidence in her abilities and complementing her strengths.

If historically your relationship with your sister has been something of a mother/daughter relationship. Take steps to move to a more adult to adult way of interacting with her. This conveys the message that you believe in her adult abilities.

If you need some comedic relief occasionally this quip may apply when you are feeling frustrated with her behavior.

"like I always said, there's no fool like an ol'e fool."

Best wishes.

Sincerely,
Mark Manley
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