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I guess I will have to do some reading to understand the dynamics of all of this. Will I be able to reach my potential if I do this nurturing of my inner child? That is probably hard for you to answer. It is probably more likely if I do the work as you have suggested. But any suggestions would be helpful. I will be buying a book today for sure!
I never went to college but always thought I would be a teacher. But I got pregnant and married at 17 and stayed married for 20 YEARS. I'm sure that had something to do with being "the good girl" or not wanting to cause waves. My ex's life & family seemed so exciting at the time. I did not have the skills or family support to take good care of myself. So I lived through my ex's (hidden) affairs, and physical and emotional abuse. I never had any serious injuries but had a fear of him and knew I could only "push things so far or else". Eventually I left, stayed single for 9 years, kind of lived my life over (without being too roudy) and now have married my soul mate. Long story short, when I hear about others in their college years, I feel like I have lost that time and all those experiences and stories that others have. I never got to "play an instrument" in elementary/jr high like my older brothers did, so I missed that too. No new bike, no horse of my own, no teen parties, no girlfriend pj parties, I used to wear some of my Mom's clothes to school because I didn't have very many (I even wore a shirt that was ripped in the back because I could hide it when it was tucked in). My point is, I could go on and on with this list but it doesn't make sense to go do music lessons now - I'm not sure I would enjoy it. Some things I did do for myself (my own new bike in my 30's, etc.) but some things are not possible to relive (teen pj parties, etc.). I have some college courses under my belt and have taken extensive real estate courses (in my 50's) and make 30K or less/year - I feel like I am very good at it, it's my passion (that I finally get to follow). Is this situation with my Mom holding me back or am I just meant to be mediocure in what I do? Also, it's hard to share experiences when I haven't had many of them like others have. It's hard to go back and do these things now. But it makes me sad especially when others are talking about their past lives. I feel like I nothing to share. Hope this makes sense. Any thoughts?