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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5763
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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I have a very dear friend and her husband are both in dementia,

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I have a very dear friend and her husband are both in dementia, she is more so tha he. They are both professionals and think nothing is wrong and I want to know how I can help she is not eating as a matter of fact forgetting to eat. He is in on dialysis 3 times a week and she is not cooking. I speak to her about this and she says everyone thinks she is crazy. She says people are stealing from her etc. She does not go to a doctor what can I do to help before it is too late without causing to much of a scene. She was an emaculate homemaker and dresser and now nothing.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 5 years ago.

Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.


It is very difficult to see friends or family decline when they used to be independent. Your friend's inability to see that this is happening is even more troublesome. If she does not know something is wrong, then it is hard to fix.


Your friend needs an evaluation. If she is over the age of 60, she may be able to get services through the Department of Aging. They employ nurses and other professionals that can come to your friend's home and do a full evaluation of her mental capacity and the living conditions. They may offer other services as well which include housekeeping assistance, Meals on Wheels and other assistance. Contact your local county government for information.


Also, you could ask your friend if she is willing to have someone come into her home to help out. Someone who can clean up and make at least one meal a day would be helpful.


Does your friend have family around? Are they willing to help? That is also another way to be sure your friend gets care.


If your friend does have a doctor, you can contact him or her for advice.


If neighbors are involved, they can help by checking on them.


Also, you may want to try your local United Way to ask what other services are available to your friend. The United Way is an clearinghouse of resources in your area and will be able to help you find agencies that can help.


I hope this has helped you,

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