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Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5418
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Im 65, divorced recently after 32 years and Ive been running

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I'm 65, divorced recently after 32 years and I've been running from something all my life. Recently a classmate who has been in our hometown all his life, is in the hospital close to death. And this weird feeling came over me about admiring him for staying in his hometown and has tons of friends and family to support him in his time of need. And I'm asking myself why ALL my life, I've been running from something. I couldn't wait to get out of my little hometown, during my career life, I always jumped from job to job, promotion to promotion, town to town, was unfaithful in my marriages during my young adult life, but after 32 years with my last wife, I couldn't handle the emotional abuse she gave me for so many years, and I divorced her. She admits the fault and we are still friends, but I'm like a gypsy now... living in my RV, traveling from town to town, no friends, only acquaintances, and very lonely. I'm like a hermit. All I do is work on Internet businesses (been doing that for 10 years) trying to make a living and have spent 100 times more on it than I've made. I'm retired now, living on social security. And all of a sudden, I'm asking myself "why have you been running aways from something all your life". And I'm still on the run. Why can't I be happy with something. It seems like the adventure is in there search for something and once I think I found it, I'm bored with it immediately and I'm off on the run again. I can't concentrate... my mind goes crazy with self talk about "what if's" and "do this, or "do that". I can't find peace.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 2 years ago.

Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.

 

It sounds like there could be a couple of things going on here. Most likely, you may have dysthymia. It is characterized by a low grade depression, lack of productivity, dissatisfaction with daily life, low attention span and trouble concentrating.

 

You could also have ADHD, which causes trouble sitting still, difficulty with concentration, and disorganization. This does not sound like the symptoms you are describing, but if you were to have a psychological evaluation, it would need to be ruled out.

 

Dysthymia usually starts when you are young. It is not certain what causes it. It can be genetic, biochemical or environmental in origin. But whatever the cause, your emotionally abusive marriage most likely added to the complications from dysthymia. Emotional abuse can be just as devastating as physical abuse. The tools used to demean you and control you affect your self esteem and feelings of worth. It would compound the symptoms of dysthymia and make it harder to cope with.

 

Depending on how severe your symptoms are, medication can help. Medication can take the symptoms down to a manageable level until therapy can start to take effect. Therapy is the best option to ultimately deal with and cure your dysthymia. You can find a therapist through your family doctor or search on line at http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/.

 

Although therapy is the best option, you can help yourself at home as well. Understanding your problem and knowing more about how to help yourself can go a long way to making you feel better. Here are some resources to get you started:

 

http://helpguide.org/mental/depression_signs_types_diagnosis_treatment.htm

 

Beating the Blues: New Approaches to Overcoming Dysthymia and Chronic Mild Depression by Michael E. Thase M.D. and Susan S. Lang

 

The Mindful Way through Depression: Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness by XXXXX XXXXX, XXXXX Teasdale, Zindel Segal and Jon Kabat-Zinn

 

Undoing Depression by Richard O'Connor

 

You can find these books on Amazon.com or if you have a library near you, they may have them as well.

 

I hope this has helped you,
Kate

Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5418
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 2 years ago.

I haven't heard from you. Did you have more questions or want clarification?

 

Kate

 

 

 

 

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