Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.
Phobias are easy to treat and with the right help, you can overcome this problem. Phobias respond well to treatment and self help. The more you know, the better you will feel.
Therapy was a very good step to take. But it sounds like you ended up with a therapist that was not very helpful. Sometimes, finding a good therapist is like finding a doctor you are comfortable with, you need to ask for recommendations and try a few before you find someone you can work with. Ask your doctor for a referral or contact the local mental health center to see if they have anyone they recommend.
Self help is also a great way to get what you need and solve your problem on your own. Here are some resources to get you started:
Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness: A Self-Help Guide Using Cognitive Behavioral Techniques by GillXXXXX XXXXX
Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming your Fear by Martin Antony Ph.D. and Richard Swinson MD FRCPC FRCP
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook (Anxiety & Phobia Workbook) by Edmund J. Bourne
You can find these books on Amazon.com or your local library may have them for you.
Also, consider support groups on line. You will find like minded individuals who can give you support and tips on how to handle how you feel.
You may also have a personality type that is very different than your husbands. Some people find it easy to be extroverted (like your husband) and some are introverted, which may describe you. If someone who is introverted tries to act extroverted, they struggle and become frustrated. Try these sites for a good description and see if it fits your personalty:
I hope this has helped you,Kate