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Penny Rayas, MFT
Penny Rayas, MFT, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 395
Experience:  I have 20 years experience in the mental health field
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My daughter, who is married and a mother, has shown a complete

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My daughter, who is married and a mother, has shown a complete change in her personality ever since she had a hysterectomy, but she was treated for depression before the hysterectomy. She stopped medication because she claims that God has healed her. I first noticed that she started needing to be in complete control of her family and situations. Then she became very angry, which was a change, then she started saying that I needed to phone before I came over and get her permission to come. I tried this but she would never call me back. Being concern, I have dropped by a few times to see if she is okay and to see if my granddaughter (6 yrs) is okay. I always find her in the bed saying she is sick. Instead of being just mad about me dropping by, she becomes infuriated and hostile toward me and says that I do not respect her boundaries. I know that she has been seeing a counselor that has a questionable reputation in the city where I live. I believe this counselor has planted a seed in her head that I am disrespecting her boundaries. You must understand that this thing about her boundaries has become an obsession with her, because this is what she constantly has said for over a year now. I have dropped by only three or four times in the past year. Last week I wanted to give her and her family gifts from my vacation, so, I tried to call first but as usual I did not get a call back. I decided to take a chance and stop by to give the gifts and she accused me of ambushing her. She became violent toward me and I honestly though she was going to attack me. I had to leave in a hurry with her saying she wanted me to get out and she never wanted to see me again. During the spring of this year, she stopped me from ever seeing my granddaughter again. Her husband is the only one working and when he gets home he cooks and handles all of the other chores. I do not believe he sees this problem. I am very upset about this because I love my daughter and believe she needs help. Should I try to talk with her husband about trying to get help for her?
Hello and thanks for asking JA. I have a few questions. How old is your daughter? Is there any history of psychotic disorders, or bi-polar in your family or your husband's family?
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
My daughter is 44 yrs old. My ex-husband was diagnosed as a psychotic, and I am treated with Major Depresssion. Mental health issues run in both sides of the family.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I have not heard a response from you since I answered your questions. Are you still working on this?

Hello there and thanks for waiting I am going on your answer. I wonder if your daughter has psychosis also. I also think that depression with psychotic features may be more likely because her psychosis happened very late. I would agree with you that you should talk to her husband about wanting to be supportive and see if he has something to say. Can you tell me a bit about your husband's symptoms of psychosis and what happened? Your daugther really believes that you are being too involved even you are not. Maybe any involvement will make things wost. How is her relationship with your husband? If she has some paranoid symptoms and you have become part of the paranoia you may need to step back since she believes what her mind is telling her' Here are the symptoms of depression with psychotic features

A family or personal history of depression or psychotic illness makes you more likely to develop this condition.


People with psychotic depression have symptoms of depression and psychosis.

Psychosis is a loss of contact with reality. It usually includes:

  • Delusions: False beliefs about what is taking place or who one is
  • Hallucinations: Seeing or hearing things that aren't there

The types of delusions and hallucinations are often related to your depressed feelings. For example, some patients may hear voices criticizing them, or telling them that they don't deserve to live. The person may develop false beliefs about their body, for example your daughter thinks she has been cured by God.

Psychotic depression requires immediate medical care and treatment.

Treatment usually involves antidepressant and antipsychotic medication. You may only need antipsychotic medication for a short period of time. I think talking to your son in law is the right idea since your daugther has some paranoia about you at the point. Be prepared for her to overeat and hurt your feelings maybe for a few months refuse to see you. I think it is important for her to get treatment. Her husband needs to know that you see some symptoms of depression and psychosis and the family history he may not know much about mental health. You can also ask her husband to call her doctor if he is worried. Let me know if you have more questions

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
My ex-husband would have spells of horrible raging. His mother and father were alcoholics. When he drank, he would act sweet but when he did not drink he could be nice or all of a sudden go off into a rage and verbally and physical attack me. I never knew what brought these episodes on because it could be over the most simple things. He may act okay about these things at one time, then another time explode over the same thing. It kept me feeling crazy because I would never know how he would react. His anger was unbelievable because he could get horribly angry over what most people would only be a little mad about. To this day, I still do not understand his personality.
I am really sorry about your experiences both with your husband and daughter. I can see from what you wrote that your daughter has some of your husband's behaviors towards you. Some of those behaviors are also learned some are inhereted. I think the only thing you can do is take care of yourself and if you think your granddaughter is in danger call the police.
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