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Category: Mental Health
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Experience:  25 years in private practice
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My daughter is 39 and her husband is 43. They have four children

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My daughter is 39 and her husband is 43. They have four children and I have watched them every night drink more and more. She has progressed from beer to hard liquor and gets enough to drink that she is obviously had way too much. I am positive that she avoids answering my phone calls at night when she has had too much because she knows i don't approve. I don't know if I should stay out of her business or try to talk to her. I made a comment to her about it about a year ago and she was offended. I think she uses drinking to cope with her life and I am terribly concerned. I am considering moving to the state where they live because I would like to be around my grandchildren more but don't want to be trying to "save" her children from alcoholism. Her dad's drinking was the cause of a divorce and
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  cathy replied 2 years ago.

cathy :

Hi and thanks for writing JA

cathy :

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Customer:

yes i am

Customer:

are you still there?

cathy :

Hi, I am so so sorry I got tied up with another JA customer when you responded. I would love to work with you on this but I am going to opt out in case you come back online and again I am working with someone else? I will look for you if you sign on again but either way I wish you all the very best on this. Cathy

Expert:  Doctor Kevin replied 2 years ago.
You need to be able to say the right things at the right time. I would attend ALAON and here is a web link for a meeting near you (http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html) I would keep the lines of communication open and call her when she has not had too much to drink like the afternoons. When ever she starts to talk about needing help for her alcohol problems I would be very supportive but I would not confront her. It is a hard thing to watch happen but keep trying and you will have a chance to help her sometime. I know because both my parents were alcoholics and suffered tremendously from it. My son is sober and I am doing everything I can to maintain sobriety. It is a tough disease.

I see that you are offline and I have provided a response to your question. You can choose now to accept it in which case I will get paid or please let me know why you don't and I will try to help further.

Doctor Kevin, Ph.D.
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1482
Experience: 25 years in private practice
Doctor Kevin and 4 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
since they are in complete denial about the serious drinking do i still wait for them to acknowledge it befor saying anything? Is it a mistake for me to move closer to them?
Expert:  Doctor Kevin replied 2 years ago.
Their denial is going to be the hardest thing to overcome. Your moving closer to them may allow you more time with your daughter. I still think going to Alanon would be your best alternative. Would your daughter consider your taking the children to Alateen? It is only when your daughter admits to her alcoholism that you can make some headway. It is all in the timing.

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