Yes, you are right. And you did tell me about your childhood. Sorry about that.
I agree it is not fair for her to allow you to assume that you have a full hour then cut you off. I would still try telling her ahead of time that you want a full hour and to call you to give you the option of canceling and rescheduling. It is only fair.
You are welcome to write me as much as you need to. I check in all weekend so I will respond as quickly as I can. When thinking of other things that work, sleep is ok to do. You could alter how much though. Maybe a shorter time sleeping? Taking slightly less medication too would help. That way, you get to escape but you also have a chance to engage in life a bit too. I agree that you do sound depressed, but I don't think it is anything you can't slowly work with and improve. What do you think?
It is ok to feel sorry for yourself sometimes. Everyone does. The key is to work to get yourself out of it too. Give yourself a time period where it is ok to feel sorry for yourself. Then move on. Plan something like writing. Or get out for 30 minutes. Make yourself balance the down with an up, if that makes sense. Don't overwhelm yourself but even a brief time doing something helps.