It sounds like you are working from feelings only and not processing what you are thinking about. When you reacted to your therapist actions, you describe your feelings, but not what you thought about the situation.
This is important because whenever something happens to us, we have two processes that occur. One is feeling and the other is thought. For example, say you are fired from your job one day, unexpectedly. You react strongly, feeling hurt, betrayed and angry. You may also be scared. But some of these feelings come from your thoughts. You begin thinking, how will I support myself, who can I rely on to help me until I get back on my feet, what is my current financial situation, etc. So both feeling and logical thought are working at the same time.
What happens for you is your feelings override your thoughts. Logic is there, but you ignore it. The feelings are so strong that you allow them to take over. This is something you can change. By changing it, you can learn to put brakes on your feelings before you hurt yourself because logic and thought will factor in and stop you.
You are also giving a lot of importance to your feelings. Feelings are a healthy part of your life, but if they are focused on and not filtered, you end up reacting to them and ignoring other important factors in your thought process. Feelings are not always accurate either. They are based on past experiences and other factors that do not always give you the clearest picture of the situation.
Next time you feel very strongly about something, try focusing on your thoughts and while muting your feelings. Write your thoughts down. See how this works for you. The goal is to help you begin to use your thoughts to help you see a situation clearer from different angles.
Let me know how this works for you.