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Thank you for contacting Just Answer. Let me see if I can help here....
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Ok.... I can see you are off line. I will go ahead and post my response for you here and we'll go from there...
Well, I have read your post as well as the additional information you have posted and I am sorry you and your wife are having some issues, but if I may say so........
..... It is somewhat refreshing to hear that there are no issues with infidelity, money, abuse and etc as you posted :)
It is not unheard of but rare to find couples who are taking a proactive approach such as you are. AND taking measures to be happier even though there are none of the major issues that I usually deal with. Also, I will comment you because left unaddressed the small issues that concern you here could lead to bigger issues - so once again you are very wise to tackle this now.
OK... to answer your question.... The one thing that I will strongly suggest is that you see a therapist who is trained and certified in Marriage and Family Therapy.
There is a certain approach that these therapist are specifically trained in and I am a proponent of it - especially in your case (based on what you said and the way you framed it) since you both seem to be willing to accept responsibility for the issues and both willing to make changes in your behavior - along with the fact that you are not dealing with addiction, etc.
So I would say you will likely do well with either of the following therapists... Rick Innis(NNN) NNN-NNNNor Jean Campbell(NNN) NNN-NNNN
Remember, there is a difference between a certified and licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and another therapist who is a Marriage Counselor, etc.
As I pointed out, Marriage and Family Therapists are specifically trained in "systemic" therapy. You will see the importance once you start your program.
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I hope I have helped you and I hope things work out well for you.
If you have more questions, just post them here. I will be alerted via E mail and I will respond as soon as I am able.