It sounds like your boyfriend is going through depression. It is normal when people start therapy to feel worst before they feel better. His therapist will teach him some coping skills. I wonder how you are coping with this. I also wonder if the two of you can see a couples therapist. All you can do is tell your boyfriend that you will be there for him when he needs you. If he wants to break up with you is nothing you can do to stop him. I think by trying to hard you may stress him out and push him away. I would say to him that you care that his emotional problems don't bother you and that you would like to be there for him. Sometimes people need some space to figure things out. I have a feeling if you give him some space he will figure this out. I understand you are his only support system but he needs to find a support group because you can't be his only support. Now I believe you need some support the support of your friends to cope with all this. Shift your focus and spend sometime with your friends
Thankyou so much for your answer, its heartbreaking to see him going through this but I dont want to stress him out any further by acting needy around him. I think he feels that "setting me free" is best for me as im a little bit in limbo at the moment with regards XXXXX XXXXX our relationship stands. We have a dog together, and all his stuff is still at my house. He has taken the bare minimum with him (just clothes, toiletries etc) so I dont feel that he really wants to call it a day just yet.
He has seen his therapist 2 or 3 times so far, how long do things usually take before he will start feeling better? He seems to be at rock bottom at the moment.
I am sorry you are going through this. I am not sure how long it will take for your boyfriend to feel better. It all depends on how depressed he is and how much trauma he working through. I am sorry you are in limbo that is not fair to you. I think the best thing to do is to do nothing at this time. Just have fun with your friends while still staying in touch with him without over-doing it. Just imagine this that you want to run away but someone is pulling you and preventing you from running away. How would you feel? That is how he is feeling right now. When we are faced with trauma we fight or flight your boyfriend is following the flight instinct. I feel that he will come back. You don't want to chase and create and push and pull pattern.
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