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Ask Eleanor
Ask Eleanor, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1517
Experience:  Marriage & Family Therapist/Prof. Counselor for 20 years
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On June 26th my daughter drove me and my husband to the emergency

Resolved Question:

On June 26th my daughter drove me and my husband to the emergency room he was having another heart attack, he is 50 yrs old I'm 51 he had open heart surgery in 1999 and heart attack in 1997 he has Coronary artery disease, On June 16th we had just finished moving because of foreclosure and bankruptcy, we are self employeed, My husband services business equipment, prior to moving we had been dealing with the foreclosure and bankruptcy for about 2 years. Since November when we found out we were going into foreclosure I broke down my behavior became unmanagable, my husband called cps and had the police excort me to the facility where they watch you for 24 hours because they want to make sure your not going to hurt yourself or others, also because we were fighting so much we were both arrested for Domestic Violence. Als
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Ask Eleanor replied 5 years ago.

Ask Eleanor :

Hello, I am here for you and am so sorry to hear about all of this. Please tell me how you are doing now? When were you in the hospital and for how long, dear?

Customer:

My husband was in the hospital for 2 days. I am so afraid I feel responsible.

Ask Eleanor :

Oh, I see. Well, mental illness is really no different from physical illness. Do you believe you could have prevented your hospitalization?

Customer:

Yes, if I had a good plan

Ask Eleanor :

Please say more about your last response, tell me what you mean by a good plan.

Customer:

It's just me and my huband raising our 2 daughters and now 2 grandchildren We started our business in 92, we live in AZ our family's are out of state we are alone and I am a social misfit so I don't get out much. The help that we get is spuradic and we don't alway do what we should, We don't have insurance so we have gone in for help but because we pay as we go as soon as the emergency is over we go on with life thinking we are cured, so there is no one to hold us accountable and no one to ask for advise or no one to say Hey you guys your screwing up before it's to late.

Ask Eleanor :

Thank you for the clafification, dear. There is hope. I am going to give you some resources for affordable help.

Customer:

ok

Ask Eleanor :

First, call the United Way Helpline (#211) and ask for the phone #s of private, non-profit counseling centers in your community. These centers offer excellent therapy/counseling (individual, marriage, family) and charge a sliding scale fee based upon income. You may also go to www.TherapistLocator.net and search for Marriage and Family Therapists where you live in Arizona. Call and ask if they see some of their clients pro bono or at a reduced fee, some do, you simply have to ask. Once you have a therapist, he/she can refer you to an affordable psychiatrist for medication evaluation. Also go online and search for support groups appropriate to your circumstances in your community, support groups are always free and can greatly help in difficult times. There are also many online support groups. You may also call the hospital and inquire about support groups for heart patients and their families, these would be free as well. Finally, go to the Partnership for Prescription Assistance website where you will find information for obtaining your and your husband's medications free or a very low cost from the drug companies. Do you have any questions about my answer, dear?

Ask Eleanor :

Are you there?

Customer:

I just called #211 the number is XXXXX in service at this time, so I called and got the number for Phx. When we do go in for counseling what are we looking for? The reason I'm asking is I'm afraid of investing time into a certain Dr. and that Dr. is not the right Dr. for us. And the other issue is I don't want to go on to an antidepressant I feel like that was part of our problem also, I feel like I was being numbed and let responsiblities slide because my natural instincts were numbed.

Customer:

Plus the fact I gained 60 lbs

Customer:

and I needed sleeping pills because I couldnt sleep than I needed adderal because I didnt have any energy.

Ask Eleanor :

First, you will not have to go on medication if you choose not to do so. I am not big on anti-depressants either, but they can be helpful at times and if you have a psychiatrist, a specialist, the correct medication and dosage can be found. There are many choices of anti-depressants now, but in any event the choice will be yours. Your mentioning the weight gain has reminded me of the importance of exercise in maintaining our mental health. Excerise is a very effective treatment for depression as it can alter our brain chemistry in the same way. Now as to finding the correct therapist The important thing is that you feel like it is a good fit for you. I imagine you will feel very comfortable with the first therapist you see, but if not find another. You therapist does not have to be a Dr. Many therapists are Master's level professionals and do excellent work with their clients. Any thing further?

Ask Eleanor :

Still there?

Customer:

I was just checking on the info you gave me to see if I had any questions right now I can't think of anything else. Thank You.

Ask Eleanor :

You are very welcome, dear. Please remember to click on the green accept button so that I will receive credit for my professional time with you and response. You may return to this Q&A for reference at any time after you accept. I wish healing for you and your husband and better days ahead, take care, Eleanor

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