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Ask Eleanor, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1517
Experience:  Marriage & Family Therapist/Prof. Counselor for 20 years
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whats the best way for a remarried with 3 teens (40)and a never

Customer Question

whats the best way for a remarried with 3 teens (40)and a never married (50) person handle money?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Ask Eleanor replied 3 years ago.

Ask Eleanor :

Hello, I am here for you and am happy to respond. Just so I am clear, when you say you handle all the bills does this mean you pay them all with your own money? Are you paying his mortgage? Also, how long have you been married, dear?

Ask Eleanor :

Are you there?

Customer :

sorry about that I was working. we have an optical company. anyway we have only been married for 3 years. and i pay for all bills except hte mortage. he decided not to pay for it when we moved in due to the value and wanted to move. so now we are in foreclosure and no one pays the mortage.

Customer :

I was married for 17 years prior. so iam not used to this splitting bills i thought you just put it all together but he is so extravagant and i say selfish with his money so i dont think it would work that way.

Ask Eleanor :

No problem. No, it will not work that way with your new husband. From what you have shared with me, I believe you and your husband would benefit greatly from seeing a Marriage and Family Therapist to help you with this issue of your finances. Problems over money is one of the big issues that can harm marital relationships. You may go to www.TherapistLocator.net to find MFTS where you live. You would not need many session, I usually contract with my cliients for 6 initial sessions. But your therapist will work with you to set a time frame for accomplishing your goals. Your differences are so great when it comes to money, you will need professional help to resolve them. Do you have any questions about my response, dear?

Ask Eleanor :

I see you are now offline. I will check back later in the evening in case you have a question about my response. If you have no further questions, please remember to click on the green accept button so that I will receive credit for my answer. You may return to this Q&A for reference at any time after you accept. I wish you, your husband and children all the best, take care, Eleanor

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Ask Eleanor
Ask Eleanor
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Marriage & Family Therapist/Prof. Counselor for 20 years