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Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5220
Experience:  Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
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Did my ugly thoughts and words affect my son, Michael, in the

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Did my ugly thoughts and words affect my son, Michael, in the womb and continue as he grew older and will I be forgiven by God and how can I forgive myself?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 5 years ago.
I just answered your previous question and I don't know if you would prefer a different expert to answer this or if you would like me to. Please let me know and if you would like someone else, I will be glad to opt out. Or if you would like me to answer, I'll be glad to respond. All the best, XXXXX XXXXX
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Dr. Mark, I want the answer to come from you and thanks.
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 5 years ago.
Hi. Thank you for responding. I am logging off for the night and I would like to give as thoughtful an answer as I can about this serious and deep question. So I'll reply tomorrow, okay? Dr. Mark
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 5 years ago.
Your question is a spiritual question and as such, needs to be from within your wisdom tradition. Because I can only respond from within my wisdom tradition. Most traditions share common principles and so let me share what I believe is the wisdom we all share together:

One of the features of time is that it only moves in one direction. We are born, we grow, we act, and we leave this world and are born into the next. We cannot reverse that direction.

And this feature of time forces upon us a framework for life that we have to accept. Because NOT accepting it is wasting ourselves and our purpose here.

That framework is that while events are marked by the year in which they happen, the MEANING and purpose of events are marked by our awareness and consciousness. Let's use you and Michael as examples.

Michael was conceived a certain time, was born and had a childhood, all in a sequence of time. And you had feelings and thoughts and intentions all within that sequence that were based on your awareness and consciousness. Those awarenesses you had created the thoughts and intentions you had and they in turn generated your behavior with Michael. This is how the time of events progressed. You know that these awarenesses were negative and they created negative thoughts and intentions and in turn these generated negative events and interactions with Michael that affected both him and you negatively.

That is not just frozen history, though. It is also spiritual reality, and that responds to new awarenesses. You have changed. You have new awarenesses and consciousness. They now need to create new thoughts and intentions. And those in turn need to generate new behavior.

We are judged, then, not by our consciousness at an earlier time, but by our consciousness now. But not just our consciousness: the intentions and then the behavior that results.

So, G-d is looking at what you are doing NOW. G-d is looking into your heart AND into your actions now. Those together (heart = awareness, intention, behavior) is what repentance means. G-d seeks our repentance, our new awareness.

And so the question is only what YOU will do with your new awareness, not whether Michael receives your love willingly or easily. But if you will persevere with your new awareness in creating new thoughts and intentions that will generate new action. And not give in to abandoning hope and giving up.

This is how G-d forgives. G-d's forgiveness is not an on-off switch. It is G-d's watching over us, seeing what we are doing with our new awareness he gave us time on earth to reach.

So have a relationship with your grandchildren, your daughter in law, and even your son may come to realize that time does not stand still.

I wish you the very best!

Please remember to click the green accept button. Feel free to continue the discussion; my goal is to get you the best answers possible. Bonuses are always appreciated! If I can be of further help with any issue, just put "for Dr. Mark" in the front of your new question, and I'll be the one to answer it. All the best, XXXXX XXXXX

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