I have been married 23 years... My wife has never wanted to be intimate with me. It has taken me to the breaking point. Two years ago, I feel in love with a woman whose husband abandoned her and her five kids. We love each other, but I am in agony, since I cannot do to my kids what her husband did to his... Even if I left, she wouldn't take me, on principle... And yet, she is the only woman who has ever been intimate with me. She is overseas, and we only communicate online now... I go crazy just waiting to hear from her from one day to the next... While she is trying to be cold, in order to keep from falling again. I live in hell... In agony... In tension... The longer I wait to hear from her, the more I start questioning if she still loves me. We used to be more "intimate" on the phone /skype, but she has really pulled back to try to keep things under control. Now I feel rejected by her AND my wife. I have so much pent up sexual frustration. Simple masturbation doesn't bring enough release... There's no intimacy by myself.
Thanks for contacting Just Answer. Let's see if I can help...
I am sorry to hear that you are in this terrible situation and moreover that is has gone on for the better part of a lifetime. You are to be commended on your commitment to you kids as well as your wife. There is no easy answer to your situation. I would only say that you are entitled to intimacy with your wife. Obviously, that has not been happening, so what to do?
Well, the best I can recommend is for you to see therapist - or better yet a life coach to help you manage the situation you are in. You see in my experience, if you try and "fix" you situation, well....... that's a lot to take on.
However, if you try and get some help or guidance to deal with the "hand" you have been dealt, you have a good chance for success and eventually happiness.
A life coach can give you direction on how to deal with communicating with the woman overseas and how to deal with your wife and kids. Once you have that a little more under control, you can start to work on the emotional side of things.
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