Ask a Psychiatrist and Get Answers to Mental Health Questions ASAP
Ahh. I see you have logged off.
Well, here's what I would suggest: You have, obviously, two choices: (1) change your husband or (2) change yourself.
Since it sounds like you have tried #1 and have not succeeded, it may be time to look at #2. (I mean, you can certainly continue to TRY to work on #1... but if your husband doesn't want to change, he won't!)
What do you mean"change myself".?
#2 is certainly trickier... and I'm certain you've been working on yourself throughout this time. But by "change yourself" I mean really one of several options: (a) stop worrying about sex altogether; (b) stop worrying about your husband's feeling about sex; (c) stay with your husband, but fulfill your sexual needs elsewhere; (d) leave your husband, and fulfill your sexual needs elsewhere.
Am I correct in assuming that your husband is unwilling to attend couples therapy?
Addressing #2 could well be "sorted out" in the context of a good relationship with a therapist, counselor, etc.
Actually the actual sex is not the priority,its the insinuation that he no longer wants aphysical relationship that is insulting and hurtful.I have worked hard to keep myself attractive and do feel rejected
Ahhh. This does clarify somewhat...
...but I think it does harken back to the original question of: Who/what are you going to change? Since it's unlikely you'll be able to change your husband's behavior (not wanting a physical relationship), what needs to change is your reaction to his behavior.
I read in your initial posting and in your chat posts... a sense of resentment and anger, which makes some sense.
...but if this has been brewing for the last 6 years... it's time for YOU to make some changes in how to respond to your husband's behavior.
Why should his behavior be viewed as "insulting?" Are you any less attractive because of his behavior?
Rejection is always insulting.Anyway is this behaviour grounds for divorce?
And yes I probably am less attractive because his behaviour makes my face set.