My girlfriend just tried to commit suicide because of something I said. I'm 27, she's 25. Now you must know that my gf and I have always been so open with each other. She's warned me that she's very sensitive but honestly this girl is the sweetest person in the world. Everyone she meets says the same. We talk about starting a family all the time. We were in the middle of planning a vacation in Italy together. I tell her all the time she's my partner in everything and my best friend. I tell her I love her everyday. She knows I've never loved anyone like this. Anyhow, what happened was this. She has an artery occlusion and it really bothers me that she sometimes smokes cigarettes. I tried telling her that I know she gets stressed but that's not the way to handle it. I mentioned a couple examples of how I compromised for her. Example 1) She's not ok with me drinking, not even 1 beer. I argued that I don't drink to get drunk and I just enjoy a beer every now and then as I find it refreshing. I even mentioned the health benefits to having a good quality beer from time to time once you don't over consume, but she was still against it so I said I'd compromise with her. Example 2) I have an ex-girlfriend from over 10 years ago. It's completely over between us, and I've never cheated and never will, but we're still friendly (not close friends, but friends I guess). Anyhow I mentioned that to my current girlfriend and she said she doesn't want me to ever talk to my ex. Also I happened to mention a girl I dated who smoked. I told my gf I didn't really love that girl who smoked, but that the relationship didn't last mainly due to the smoking and that I told myself I'd never date a smoker. Mind you, this ex was a heavy smoker. My current girlfriend doesn't come close. I wasn't threatening to leave my gf in any sense, I just wanted her to know how strongly I feel against smoking. I made it very clear that I care about her health as much as I do my own and that she needs to stop. I also said she's being kinda irrational on the beer thing as well as the being friends with my ex thing, but I'll compromise for her because I love her so much. Yes I love beer but I love my girlfriend much more. And my ex and I aren't really close friends anyway. Anyhow I asked her to compromise in the same way with the smoking. She doesn't smoke often and said she's not addicted so I told her she needs to stop or else we'll keep having problems. By problems I meant that I'd never be ok with her smoking because of her heart condition, so unless the smoking stopped, the arguments wouldn't stop either. I was only trying to show concern for her health, but she totally misunderstood me. She said she thought I was threatening to leave her when I mentioned my relationship that didn't last long with my ex who smoked and thought I would leave her if she smoked another cig. She was so sad
because she thought I thought she was trying to control me by saying I can't talk to my ex. This was a total surprise to me. It was literally just a couple days ago she dealt with something similar. She was friends with a guy, and his gf said he couldn't talk to her anymore. When he told her this, she got so upset at him. I told her that he probably wanted to be friends with her still, but his girlfriend was jealous that he was talking to another girl so much. My girlfriend totally couldn't understand why she would be jealous. "I tell him I love you the time, he knows this" she said, "He's so much younger than me, I would never be with him", etc. She actually got upset with him for ending their friendship, so I would've never expected her to be jealous of me potentially being friends with my ex. Am I outta line? Anyhow she told me she cut her hand and luckily there was a clinic next door and her friend was there to take care of her. She told me she almost died. I've told her before, I wouldn't do or say anything to purposely hurt her. Even the day before the incident (yesterday) I told her one of the things I worry most about is accidentally saying something to upset her, and all she said was "I know", and now this. She blamed me, and I feel horrible. Now I'm petrified of doing or saying the wrong thing. She also said it wouldn't happen again, but I honestly don't know what to think. I'm so hurt by what she did
. She hurt herself and she hurt me. Also, I should mention she's going through a lot of stress
. We're currently apart (in seperate countries). Her dad has leukemia and heart problems, and almost died recently. Her best friend recently died in a car crash. Her mom remarried but is being threatened by her husband. Her 3 step brothers are threatening her life for horrible reasons. She's been recently robbed at gunpoint, thrown in jail for 3 days, and her car was destroyed due to the political instability where she is. Her ex-finance tried to rape her (was unsuccessful). Also, her heart problem is fairly serious and sometimes causes her chest pain. There's actually more but the botXXXXX XXXXXne is NONE of the bad things that happened to her were her fault. I don't know what to do. Please help.