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1. In social situations he will remain withdrawn until he hears something he relates to when he will suddenly jump into the conversation and suddenly becoming very driven. He will proceed to make it all about him often failing to sense when others are losing interest. Once stimulated he won't sense when it is time to leave.
2. He makes little effort to spend time with people and has no friends, only co-workers and aquaintances. He doesn't go out of his way even when it comes to his 3 children. His oldest daughter has told him she worked thru her anger over his neglect and just accepts that he will never show any real interest or affection. He waits for others to initiate interaction which makes intimacy very onesided. He has expressed that he wants other to just give him instructions what they want and he will carry the orders out.
3. He is a loner who spends most of his time just existing: doing chores, attending to his own needs, watching TV. He had hobbies when he was younger but gave them up because he becomes consumed by them. He finds great pleasure in passively watching others while they do things without interacting. He is a service technician who works on his own.
4. He will respond awkwardly because he tries to relate everything to his own narrow experiences and views so his conversations can seem stiff and rehearsed, like a script of some sort. He uses the same pleasant, courteous but distant manner with even familiy members, He also seems to lack the sense of others boundaries so he comes off as insenstive and selfish.
5. He has been like this as long as I have known him, 25 years.
I agree that the symptoms seem to fit the description of Aspergers that I am familiar with.
Some of his other behaviors and characteristics include:
His previous marraige ended because he believed he was being neglected so he became unfaithful to meet his needs.
When he doesn't get his way he gets passive-agressive and manipulative, seeking sympathy from others, or just shuts down.
He doesn't detect that he is doing anything hurtful and gets defensive when it's pointed out to him.
The result is his loved ones feel abandoned, neglected, betrayed, insecure.
So do you think it's most likely a diagnosis of Aspergers?