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Anna
Anna, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1945
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years in addictions and mental health.
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I am beyond upset. My grandsons ex-wife is a bully with a

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I am beyond upset. My grandson's ex-wife is a bully with a very bad anger issue. She seems to be the worst when her life is not going well. In the last 2 weeks she has attacked my grandson, me, my daughter and my granddaughter. We could handle that, we are used to it, but now she has poisoned my great-granddaughter with her unfounded anger. I am so upset, my ggdaughter called me and texted me that she never wants to talk to me again. Is there any advise you can give me. Thank you

Anna :

Hello & Welcome to Just Answers.

Anna :

Does she have trouble in most of her relationships?

Anna :

I think that I missed you...sorry for that. I'll leave some information for you that you can access and hopefully find out more about the lady.

Anna :

Advice? It really depends on the age of your ggdaughter. If she is an adult, you may just want to send her a short note stating your love for her, and then give her some time. Drama is better waited out than dashed into. After tempers have cooled and the ex has moved onto other targets, perhaps you can contact the ggdaughter and test the waters.

Anna :

Emotionally volatile people need space, but they don't often act that way, so it's up to the saner folks in the mix to back off and let some healing time enter the situation.

Anna :

Take care of yourself and enjoy the relationships that are working right now. That alone may attract the interest of your ggdaughter.

Anna :

My best to you.

Customer:

She has trouble in all of her relationships. She does not finish anything, looses job after job, fights with her family, moves her daughter from town to town and school to school. She is not

Customer:

abusive to her daughter that I know of.

Anna :

In that case, check out the link I posted above...I think you might find some clues as to what is wrong with her and how you can handle her. A great book for this is: http://cgi.ebay.com/Stop-Walking-Eggshells-Paul-T-Mason-Randi-Kr-/270737847829?pt=US_Nonfiction_Book&hash=item3f093bb615

Anna :

Stop Walking of Eggshells by Mason & Kreger

Anna :

It's helped many people in your shoes.

Anna :

I'm sorry...I just saw the part of your note that said she was 11. I think your text to her was perfect, and now just let it rest for a bit. I think you've got a good grasp of the situation - you've just got an unstable person in the mix.

Customer:

I feel so bad for my grandson, he does everything he can for her. The woman moved her from Mt. to Fl. 5 years ago, my grandson moved to Fl. to be near her. Then she moved her back to Mt. and he is still in Fl. refuses to follow the woman. His daughter is being angry with him too.

Anna :

I would suggest the book to him also---this type behavior problem doesn't go away. She's venting her anger through her daughter, and it's rare to be able to stop that. He's right to not follow her around-she's unstable.

Anna :

I hope this helps you. I need to sign off now for a few hours, but if you don't feel your question was answered, let me know and I'll come back to it. I'm sorry you're having to witness this in your family - it's not something that anyone wants to deal with.

Customer:

do you think the girl will come back to us at some point?

Anna :

Yes. They usually do.

Customer:

Thank you for your answers, I wish it gave me more hope, but I guess I knew what you would say.

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