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TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5770
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Im a women 57 yrs old...My husband died in a car accident

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I'm a women 57 yrs old...My husband died in a car accident 4 yrs. ago..I'm with a wonderful supportive man now..But my problem is for know reason I wake up inthe morning with such depression...Sometimes I am so depressed, but for what, I cannot tell you..I do not have financial worries yet I constantly worry about money..I feel so very sad..I should be living and enjoying my life, but yet I sometimes feel I'm in such a dark place..My overall health is very good..Please can you help me..I also suffer with for know reason heart palpations...Plus I'm so emotional..This person is not me I've been this way for about 9 Mo. I want the old me back..

Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.

 

It sounds like you are still grieving over the loss of your husband. And no, there is nothing wrong with you. It is perfectly normal to grieve for a long period of time over such a loss.

 

You are probably worrying about money because it gives you a sense of control. When you lost your husband, you lost some control over your life. Grief can also make you feel you have lost control. Grieving is a deep and involuntary emotional reaction to a death. And worrying gives you a feeling that you can control something by giving you something to focus on. So you are reacting very normally.

 

The heart palpations are probably related to the depression and also could be some anxiety you are experiencing. Anxiety is often closely related to depression and vice versa. Make sure you see your doctor to rule out any physical reason for the palpitations. If you are fine physically, then you will know it's emotional.

 

There are many ways you can help yourself overcome your grief. The first step is to see a counselor. You can ask your doctor for a referral or if you attend church, talk to your pastor. Or you can search on line at http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/.

 

You can also help yourself at home. Here are some resources for you:

 

http://www.goodgriefcenter.com/

 

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm

 

Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief by Martha Whitmore Hickman

 

How To Go On Living When Someone You Love Dies by Therese A. Rando

 

The Grief Recovery Handbook, 20th Anniversary Expanded Edition: The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce, and Other Losses including Health, Career, and Faith by John W. James and Russell Friedman

 

You can find these books on Amazon.com or your local library may have them for you.

 

I hope this helps,

Kate

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